AL AMY BRENT FUZZ_TOWNSHEND GLYN JOHNNY_VEGAS MR_VANOS NARRATOR NEIL RICK ROB SPEAKER_8 TIM_SHAW WILLIAMS_RACING_WORKER


NARRATOR
This time on Car SOS...
TIM SHAW
I have dreamed of us having an E46. Few photos for the family album.
NARRATOR
Can the boys take a dilapidated driveway relic?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
We have found, beneath the surface, cracks in the body shell.
NARRATOR
And turn it into an homage to the ultimate M3.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Ooh. Okay, it's fast.
TIM SHAW
No, no. Not okay. Keep enjoying it.
NARRATOR
Using nothing more than Tim's weekly shop.
NARRATOR
Spark plug, a carrot.
NARRATOR
A Formula 1 favour.
TIM SHAW
Is that what I think it is?
NARRATOR
And help from a comedy legend.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Why are there no headaches in the jungle?
NARRATOR
To make its owner's automotive dreams come true.
RICK
Oh my god! That's my car.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Here we are in the beautiful Staffordshire Moorlands. I've never been here before. This is amazing.
TIM SHAW
It's not big enough.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
What do you mean?
TIM SHAW
It's not big enough to contain my excitement. I have planned for this day.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, I know, I know. It's written all over you. How many of these cars have you owned?
TIM SHAW
Seven.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Seven of them. I mean, that's just not healthy. That's an obsession.
TIM SHAW
Absolutely. And I couldn't care less what you think. Because today we are picking up a very special car that I've been waiting for this very moment in time, to announce this car, all my life.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
BMW M3, E46.
NARRATOR
Launched in the year 2000, the E46 is the third generation of three series to emerge from BMW's top secret Motorsport division. Based on their championship winning touring car, it's the automotive equivalent of Usain Bolt in a tuxedo. The ultimate blend of power and sophistication. A practical supercar that's as at home on the track as it is on the school run.
NARRATOR
Under the bonnet sits a 3.2l naturally aspirated power plant, producing over 340 horsepower, 50 more than the previous generation M3, which means a sprint to 60 takes a shade over five seconds. Fast enough to give Porsche 911 owners a squeaky bottom at the lights. 20 years ago, that thrill would have cost you the equivalent of  80,000. But today, a used E46 can be had for around 10.
NARRATOR
However, before you rush out to buy one, remember that after 20 years of working harder than a mosquito at a nudist colony, many of these cars are hiding worn out components and potentially expensive repair bills.
TIM SHAW
It is the best car that has ever been made. Absolute fact as far as I'm concerned. Nobody will ever persuade me otherwise.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
You're wrong.
TIM SHAW
No, I'm not wrong.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, you're so wrong.
TIM SHAW
I'm not wrong.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Didn't they have a problem with the rear floor area, where the rear subframe mounts onto it? And what about the the BMW variable valve timing system.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
VANOS?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
The VANOS system, and also, of course, engine problems as well.
TIM SHAW
Whatever. I'm not talking to you about this anymore. We've got to go and meet Amy and Brent.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay.
TIM SHAW
Okay. So Amy is the partner of the guy who owns the car.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Rick, yeah.
TIM SHAW
Who's called Rick.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
So we're off to Amy and Rick's place.
TIM SHAW
No, we're not actually, because the car has been stolen away by Brent, who is Rick's brother.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay.
TIM SHAW
Too many Car SOS fans where Rick and Amy live.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay, fantastic.
TIM SHAW
We're cool here. 
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Avoiding the twitching curtains..
TIM SHAW
Yep. 
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right. Come on. Now, remember, keep it on the down-low. Nice and calm. Keep calm.
TIM SHAW
Look at that.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Hiya. How you doing? You must be Brent, I'm Fuzz, how's it going? Hi. You must be Amy.
TIM SHAW
Amy, Brent. How you doing, where are you? Right. Okay, first and foremost, have we got the car here without Rick being sus?
BRENT
He thinks it's going into a unit down the road here, in storage.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, okay.
BRENT
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
So we've got the green light.
BRENT
Yes.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Excellent.
TIM SHAW
You guys, look around the car. Let's get it loaded up and out of here. We need to go and talk about your boy. Come on, let's do it.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Look, we've got a complete and standard engine bay here. Now, to me, that puzzles me. Why has this car not been being driven?
BRENT
Well, it's been off the road for a while and it didn't run properly, so.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right. So it's got an engine fault?
BRENT
Yeah.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Well, how long has it been off the road?
BRENT
2015.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Really?
BRENT
Yeah.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Alright. Okay. How many miles has it done? 110,000 miles. It's an old car that has been sitting around. It looks great, but underneath it, there's a proper old rotter, I reckon.
TIM SHAW
What kind of guy is Rick?
AMY
Oh, he's a great guy. He's a really good dad. He's a good boyfriend.
TIM SHAW
Is he a car guy?
AMY
Yeah. He loves his cars.
TIM SHAW
I want to know what that car means to him, because it's a very, very special car.
AMY
Oh, it means absolutely everything to him.
TIM SHAW
How long has he had it?
AMY
Maybe 14 years. He had it before we got together.
TIM SHAW
And how long you been together?
AMY
13.
TIM SHAW
Right, so hang on, it was It was the car that helped, did it?
AMY
He took me out in it.
TIM SHAW
Did he take you out in it?
AMY
Yeah. He used to pick me up on a Wednesday night.
TIM SHAW
Oh, is that good times, good memories?
AMY
Definitely, yeah.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
What I do worry about is the rear subframe underneath here, and the floor where it all attaches, because that all cracks and it's a known fault area. If this one hasn't been modified or upgraded, then we're going to have to do all of that work on it as well. I can't help but think that it might be hiding stuff. We've got corrosion, we've got engine problems, potentially we've got rear cracks where the subframe mounts and stuff like that. So there could actually be a lot of work waiting to burst out of this car. Right, should we start by getting it loaded up?
BRENT
Yeah.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Come on then.
TIM SHAW
Why is the car in the state it's in? For a guy who clearly knows what that car is, and it means a lot to him.
AMY
I think there's a few problems with it.
TIM SHAW
What were the problems?
AMY
Conrods.
TIM SHAW
Sweet, buried deep inside the engine, connecting the pistons to the crank. The conrods, there's a problem with them. Anything else you need to drop on me?
AMY
Thanos. VANOS. 
TIM SHAW
Yes. That's right, it's called VANOS. It's a, it's a variable valve timing system.
AMY
Also, money is, well, it's very expensive for all the BMW parts.
TIM SHAW
Is that the reason why it stayed off the road?
AMY
He's had a quite a tough few years actually, because he got quite poorly.
TIM SHAW
How did that start?
AMY
He actually had a hernia operation, and it was after the operation that he started to get this rash. He was ill with it as well. It's not just like, oh, I've got a rash. He was actually in bed, like, he couldn't go to work, didn't know really what it was, like, what was causing it. He was then diagnosed with low grade non-Hodgkin lymphoma, which is a type of blood cancer.
TIM SHAW
What happened on that day?
AMY
We just thought it was one of his normal routine check-ups, as he does. So he went on his own, and he actually texted me at work and says it's cancer. That's not nice, really, for anyone to go to the hospital on your own, [CRIES] and be told that you've got cancer.
TIM SHAW
Okay. Is it is it curable?
AMY
No. It's incurable.
TIM SHAW
How has it affected him?
AMY
Well, he's had to have six months' worth of chemo. That made him really, really badly, I've never, ever seen him that poorly, ever.
TIM SHAW
So for him to know that the car's going to get done.
AMY
Oh God. He'd love it.
TIM SHAW
Would he?
AMY
Yeah, definitely 100%.
TIM SHAW
Come on, let's go see how Fuzz is getting on. Come on.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Alright, come on.
TIM SHAW
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, come on.
TIM SHAW
Carry on, carry on, get it shut! Yes! E46 M3 coming back to our place.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
TIM SHAW
Who's got an E46 M3?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Not you. Rick has.
NARRATOR
Yes. It might be Tim's dream car, but this one could be turning into a nightmare.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Alright, okay, I can see it written all over your face. You love those cars.
TIM SHAW
Oh, man.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
But look, I'm worried about this.
TIM SHAW
Right. Well, Amy did mention to me she said something about the issue, well, Ricky mentioned conrods to her.
TIM SHAW
Conrods. It's going to be bearings.
TIM SHAW
VANOS, I think it's called.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay. Ding! There we go. There's another one.
TIM SHAW
Yeah, well, there you go.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Brilliant. Sounds like the best car in the world. Yeah, yeah. And wait till we get that subframe down. I bet there's cracks there.
TIM SHAW
Yeah.
NARRATOR
Yes, if points made prizes, the boys would be big winners, because they've already got conrod bearing and VANOS issues. Two out of three problems that can kill off this generation of M3. So despite its good looks, saving Ricky's pride and joy from the jaws of the scrapheap won't be straightforward.
TIM SHAW
Come on, come on then, let's go underneath perfection.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Well, I'm just looking at some of the best rust that I've ever seen.
TIM SHAW
What are you on about?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Well, it's the rust on the best car ever built.
TIM SHAW
Oh. Shut up. Look, I know we've got rust, okay. I can see this car as rusty, it's a classic car. But it is, and I do believe it is, the greatest car in the world Fuzz.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, hold on, there's something that I do want to look at here.
TIM SHAW
What are you doing here?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
And as I can see, there are some hairline cracks starting to form there. But sometimes it's so bad that it can actually write the cars off.
TIM SHAW
Right, hang on. So let's think about this. So we've got problems with the VANOS, problem with the engine bearings. I mean, to be fair Fuzz, you'd walk away from this car for less.
NARRATOR
The boys have got their hands on what should be the ultimate driving machine, a BMW E46 M3.
TIM SHAW
I want to show you the S54 engine. It's the engine, man.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay, okay.
NARRATOR
And although Tim's more excited than a dog with two tails to have his favourite car in the world on the ramp.
TIM SHAW
3.2l, 24 valve, naturally aspirated. No cheating, no turbos, no superchargers.
NARRATOR
Fuzz is less convinced.
TIM SHAW
It's still, in my mind Fuzz, and I don't care what you say, the car that we're sitting on the bonnet of is still the greatest car in the world.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
The greatest degraded, rusting old heap of a car in the world.
NARRATOR
Yes, Ricky's BMW M3 might look like a dream, but it turns out it's nothing more than a pig in lipstick. Because underneath its handsome exterior lies the entire set of issues that can lead to this generation of the ultimate driving machine being recycled into the ultimate washing machine. First off, there are the conrod bearings. They ensure the crankshaft rotates smoothly. We know there's a problem with those, but what damage have they done to the rest of the engine's components? Then there's the VANOS unit. A nifty bit of kit when it works, but according to Amy, this one doesn't. Which means Ricky's already tired engine will have been working even harder to compensate. And then there's the cracks in the body where it mounts to the rear subframe. If it's not dealt with properly, it can tear these cars apart. So will the boys have caught it in time, and can they fix it?
NARRATOR
So, with no time to waste, the 3.2l power plant is being stripped out, so Tim can try to find an expert to repair the complex VANOS unit, which leaves Fuzz to investigate what damage 20 years of overenthusiastic driving has done to those conrod bearings.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
So what we need to do is inspect our big end and main bearings at the bottom here on the crankshaft, to make sure that they are not worn and scored. If they are, then we've got a bigger job on our hands. To see how bad they can get, here's a bearing out of another engine. Now this one has worn all the way away, and that means that that would be knocking and clattering about in the bottom of the engine, a sort of unholy, rumbling sound that you get when an engine's under load, and its bearings are worn. Now BMW M3s tend to be driven very hard, but the way to get more life out of the engine is let it warm up a little before giving it the beans. Because if you've got lubrication all around the engine, then it's going to be up to temperature and ready to take everything that the nut behind the steering wheel is going to give it.
NARRATOR
This may have been the engine of the year in 2001, but more than 20 years of being ridden harder than a Grand National winner takes its toll on the bearings. If they're badly worn, they can produce metal shavings, which contaminate the oil, potentially causing further damage, which would require a full engine replacement.
NARRATOR
So while the investigation continues. Tim should be working on getting the VANOS unit repaired, not playing Banksy.
TIM SHAW
Anyone know what that is? That is the variable valve timing device made by BMW on Rick's engine, which has a problem. Amy mentioned that that thing's pretty much battered. It's called the VANOS. Now, the challenge is to explain what that thing there does. And in order to do so, I'm going to go back to basics.
NARRATOR
Yes. To truly grasp how the VANOS works, it's essential to first understand the basics of an engine. And as Tim's just got back from the supermarket, he's using his weekly shop to demonstrate how one works.
TIM SHAW
The, carrot, the spark plug, the lemonade bottle, that is the cylinder. The potato masher, that is the piston.
TIM SHAW
So let's have a look. When we rotate this, so have a look, we've got the the masher at the top. And as it rotates and comes down, the valve, or the little door here, has been opened thanks to that spud. And in goes some nice new petrol and air. And when this masher gets to the bottom, the valve shuts. So now, inside of there we have petrol and air mix, at which point the spark plug, the carrot, goes [NOISE]. A little spark which then sets fire to that explosive mixture inside of there. What happens? Well, the potato masher goes flying down with such ferocity, it generates so much momentum, it's still going, and it comes back up again, at which point Mr. Spud over here, he's opened the exhaust door, and allowing out the burnt petrol and air, as in the black smoke. When it gets to the top, he shuts that door. And that is one full cycle. So that can repeat again and again and again. But what the hell is a VANOS? Well, BMW, they looked at this standard bog-o internal combustion engine, where the doors open and close at precisely the same time every single cycle. What about if we could change the length of time at which they stay open and they close for? It's a cold day, you want to get a bit more fuel in there. So this door stays open for a little bit longer. And what about when you're thrashing your car? You might want the exhaust opening a bit longer. So hang on a minute, what we could really benefit from is if you give the engine the ability to open and close the doors at different times, then you can get better performance from an engine. And that is precisely what that thing does.
NARRATOR
Yes, all he needs to do now is hurry up and track down a specialist who can fix it.
NARRATOR
Back with Fuzz.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
There we go. There is our oil pump and pick up. Now we can get to all of our journals. So just loosen these off.
NARRATOR
Are Ricky's bearings in the same state as Tim's grocery shop?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
I found this bearing as the worst worn example, this big end bearing. So this fits into the connecting rod and goes onto the crankshaft. Now I can just see at this point here a little bit of orangey red showing through. Now that is the copper substrate. If that's showing through, that means the white metal has worn, so the bearing is absolutely beyond redemption. So it needs to be replaced, as do all its compatriot bearings.
NARRATOR
Looks like Fuzz has caught the bearings in the nick of time before any catastrophic damage. Rick's engine has had a lucky escape, but if the bearings aren't the reason the car went off the road a decade ago, what is?
NARRATOR
A faulty VANOS looks like the prime suspect.
TIM SHAW
Welcome to Darlington, in the north of the country. We're driving up to see a guy called Mr VANOS. Guess what he fixes? Yeah, those things that you're now an expert on.
TIM SHAW
Mr. VANOS.
MR VANOS
Tim, how are you?
TIM SHAW
How you doing, man? Good to see you. Is that what I think it is, over there?
MR VANOS
An E46 M3. Best car in the world.
TIM SHAW
I completely agree. Right, okay. Anyway, this is something I'm hoping you recognise.
MR VANOS
It looks very familiar. First thing for this is we'll strip it down. Have a look inside, and see what's going on.
TIM SHAW
Okay.
TIM SHAW
I know the job that it does, but I don't know how it does it.
MR VANOS
It's a hydraulic unit. Nothing more.
TIM SHAW
Oh, is it?
MR VANOS
Yeah, it's two pistons with an electrical part that moves the pistons in and out.
TIM SHAW
Right. So what's the first problem that this unit is likely to have?
MR VANOS
First issue will be piston seals.
TIM SHAW
Yeah. So that's like the plunger from a syringe.
MR VANOS
It is.
TIM SHAW
Without the rubbery bit on it, or the rubbery bit that makes the seal has just perished.
MR VANOS
Yes, yeah.
TIM SHAW
Yes. So that will not get a seal inside of that, meaning that, what, the oil just works its way around it?
MR VANOS
It leaks past it, and because it runs at such high pressure, it leaks past at quite a rate. And when you're driving the car, you usually feel it as a low RPM, jerky, and, yeah, backwards and forward.
TIM SHAW
Okay. Right, yeah.
MR VANOS
Unpleasant to drive. Next problem is another well known problem. Oil pumps.
TIM SHAW
So hang on, so this unit here has its own oil pump to generate pressure for these two little pistons.
MR VANOS
Yes. That'll generate around about 90 bar of pressure when it's running.
TIM SHAW
So not only do they have a problem with those seals, but also you're saying the oil pump itself is weak.
MR VANOS
They can wear away the shaft in the middle, but the drive can also snap off, which is a really common problem.
TIM SHAW
Wow. So this problem for the VANOS was actually, well, that thing's riddled with problems then.
MR VANOS
It's inherently flawed.
NARRATOR
So a faulty rubber seal and a worn out pump was all it took to take Ricky's car off the road.
TIM SHAW
Can we fix this one?
MR VANOS
It can be fixed.
NARRATOR
So to ensure that it lasts for the next 20 years, Tim's leaving it with Mr VANOS, who's going to recondition it with brand new parts.
NARRATOR
And with that, the boys have solved two of the big three. This might be the most straightforward renovation in Car SOS history. Time to share the good news with Amy and Brent.
TIM SHAW
Fuzzbot. She's here. Brent's here. Amy's here.
BRENT
Hiya, y'alright? Yeah, I'm good. 
TIM SHAW
Bottom line is this car is going to be sweet. Okay? So we're going to get it back to you soon. But, what's this? Tim, there's something I want to talk to you about. Well, then I'm here. Fuzz is here. Let's have it then.
AMY
He's been talking about the car, and he's planning on, in summertime, doing it up as a CSL lookalike.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
CSL lookalike?
TIM SHAW
Yeah, right. Let me explain what that means for us. A CSL lookalike, the CSL was a coupe sport lightweight. They made 1383 of them. It was the...
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Well, that doesn't sound good. So are we talking wheels?
TIM SHAW
No, no, dude, this thing, it was like BMW made this one, then made an even better one. They only made it in two colours. Silver grey metallic and sapphire black. Absolutely beautiful.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Is this the silver grey metallic?
TIM SHAW
No, no, no. It's a complete colour change.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
That is a massive undertaking. It slows down everything. It's a big job. It means that we have to go even further into the car and take it apart even more than it's been taken apart so far.
TIM SHAW
Finished? Excellent. Right. This is an important question. Which one is it going to be?
BRENT
Black.
AMY
Grey.
TIM SHAW
We're going to give you 30 seconds to think about that, because I've got another question for you whilst you're here. We want to create a reveal. Other than his car, what else is he into in life?
AMY
Comedy.
TIM SHAW
Okay, so he likes comedians?
AMY
Yes.
TIM SHAW
Now the colour. Anyone got a coin on them? You're saying black?
BRENT
Black?
TIM SHAW
You're saying grey.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, hold on. Do I get a say in this? I'd like a three sided coin, please.
TIM SHAW
Technically it is. So if it lands on its side, you're having what?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Well, I'm having original colour.
TIM SHAW
So original, this colour?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yes.
TIM SHAW
Okay. What's black?
AMY
Heads.
TIM SHAW
Black.
BRENT
Black, heads.
TIM SHAW
Your tails, grey.
BRENT
Heads.
AMY
Heads.
TIM SHAW
Ah, black.
BRENT
Black it is.
TIM SHAW
Black it is. It's no longer grey. And that's a gutted look. [LAUGHS] Look at that. You're going to be a busy man. There's your quid. Better go. He's got a lot of work to do. Come on, free him up. There you go. Crack on, mate. There you go.
NARRATOR
And just like that, this restoration got a whole lot more complicated.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Unbelievable.
NARRATOR
Tim and Fuzz have their hands full restoring this 2003 E46 M3 that's been decomposing on the driveway for more than a decade. It was once the pride and joy of 48 year old Ricky. But after the notorious big three took it off the road, and he was diagnosed with cancer, he's been unable to get his silver dream machine back up and running.
TIM SHAW
I want to know what that car means to him.
AMY
Oh, it means absolutely everything to him.
NARRATOR
And as if rescuing this German rocket from the jaws of the scrap heap wasn't challenging enough, the team now face the epic task of turning this standard M3 into an ultra rare CSL edition.
NARRATOR
So, to find out what they're up against, the boys are hitting the road for some emergency research.
TIM SHAW
You might regret this drive Fuzzbot.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
Because I'm driving the E46 M3, one of only 422, the CSL.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right. Okay.
TIM SHAW
Coupe sport lightweight.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Why am I going to regret it?
TIM SHAW
Hold on to your seat.
TIM SHAW
Punched into your back seat.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay, it's fast.
TIM SHAW
No, no. Not okay. Keep enjoying it.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
No, I'm not okay.
TIM SHAW
You are.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
I'm not.
TIM SHAW
You're fine. You're fine.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
It's too quick.
TIM SHAW
Listen to that growl.
TIM SHAW
Man, 360 horsepower, this CSL is 30 more horses than, but 110kg lighter than Rick's E46 M3, which is, and I maintain, the greatest car in the world, but they just tweaked it with this one, the CSL. This is the way Rick wants his car to look, dude. Just like one of these. So this car is considered the holy grail for anyone who loves an E46 M3.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
I have to say, it does feel remarkably sure-footed. No pun intended.
TIM SHAW
Ferraris, Lamborghinis, supercars that do 250mph don't make sense on British roads.
TIM SHAW
It's like taking a Grand National winner and doing donkey rides on the beach with it. The E46 M3 gets everything about motoring in the UK on the nail. Yes, it handles well. Yes, you can use it as a daily with the kids in the back, and not hammer it. But yes, you can take it on a track and absolutely have it sideways.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Would you call this the thinking person's supercar?
TIM SHAW
Yes, in a way.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
What I want to know is, I mean, we know that Rick wants a CSL lookalike.
TIM SHAW
Yeah, like this
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah, like this. So what can we do? I mean, it's lost 110kg. We can't do that with Rick's car.
TIM SHAW
No, no we can't, and they did it with the carbon fibre roof, they did it with all the carbon fibre centre console and the plenum on the front of the 30 horsepower on the engine. There are so many things which make this car a car that we cannot make Rick's exactly the same as. It will only ever be a lookalike. But it's acceptable in the E46 M3 world because it's such a niche car.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
And so just having the look of it, the sort of, is it or isn't it moment, as it goes past people, I can understand that as well. Okay, right, I'm on board with that, I understand that. I get it.
TIM SHAW
We can make it that car that when it goes down the street, everybody else who knows their M3s goes, ooh, I just saw a CSL. Yes!
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yes!
NARRATOR
However, the big transformation can't begin until Fuzz conquers the final challenge of the big three, cracks in the body around the rear subframe.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right. Now, the BMW M3 E46 may be one of the hottest cars on the planet, according to Tim Shaw, but it's about to get hotter because we're going to have to weld in some reinforcement around this area of the shell. Now this is where the rear subframe mounts. The rear subframe carries the rear axle and of course all the rear suspension. What happens is so much power comes through from that hugely powerful engine, when it gets transferred out to the rear axle, it puts the subframe under twisting and torsional stresses, which in turn leads to cracking of the body shell. But once we get this in and start welding it in, then we are adding strength, adding future proofing. And that is what we need to do to this car.
NARRATOR
And that starts with spraying the subframe and new brackets with a coat of weld through primer to help protect them from rust in the future.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
We're going to start with my section here and here.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
I've got my hat on as an early warning device. If I can smell a hot sheep, I get out of here. I take the hat off pretty quickly.
NARRATOR
Yes, it brings a whole new meaning to the phrase hot under the collar. And that's not all that's causing Fuzz to work up a sweat.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
We've just unearthed some of the reasons why people need to look very carefully at the back ends of their M3s. We've cut in to let in some new metal, and we have found beneath the surface, in a hidden area, cracks. Cracks in the body shell. So we'll weld these up, put the new plates in, and then the car will have that additional strength that it needs.
NARRATOR
So while Fuzz continues his hunt for cracks in the metal subframe, Tim is turning his attention to carbon fibre, and those all important touches that are going to transform the look of Ricky's car into a CSL. And speaking of a CSL, Tim does know he has to give that car back, right?
TIM SHAW
Neil.
NEIL
Hi, Tim.
TIM SHAW
What a place to be. Oh my God, I'm jealous of your job. Is that what I think it is?
NEIL
That's Alex's car from last year.
NARRATOR
This is the home of British Formula 1 team Williams Racing. A place where they certainly know a thing or two about this wonder material.
TIM SHAW
What a thing to be in front of you, eh? It's incredible. It is a sight to behold. And let's be honest here, if it wasn't for carbon fibre, what would be left on the floor here? I mean, an engine and a gearbox, and that's pretty much it.
NEIL
You know, carbon fibre is 85% of the car.
TIM SHAW
Is it really?
NEIL
Yes. Well, even the gearbox is carbon fibre as well.
TIM SHAW
Is it really? 
NEIL
Yes, yes.
TIM SHAW
Let me tell you what I'm hoping you might be able to help us with. We're doing a car up for a guy called Ricky. Well, his wife has just told me that she would love it if we could make his car, a BMW E46 M3. A car you hopefully know and love.
NEIL
I do, yes. Most definitely.
TIM SHAW
Okay, right. So that is the CSL version that's dripping in carbon fibre. Now, considering he's a fan of you guys, and you guys make carbon fibre stuff, is there any way you can have his favourite people make a bit of carbon fibre stuff for his car? That's the stuff dreams are made of.
NEIL
We won't say no. We'll most definitely support you in this project. Most definitely.
TIM SHAW
Oh man, that is incredible.
NARRATOR
Since its introduction in the early eighties, carbon fibre has revolutionised Formula 1.
TIM SHAW
This is carbon fibre right in front of our eyes, being laid, right? And what are we making here?
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
This is an element one, so it's the forward element of the front wing of the current car.
TIM SHAW
How can you say that without a smirk on your face, dude?
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
You get used to it.
TIM SHAW
I know, but, dude, that is so cool.
NARRATOR
This wonder material is up to 10 times stronger than steel, and that incredible strength comes from the thousands of parallel strands of carbon atoms that have been tightly woven together into a sheet.
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
So if you were to pull that across it at 45, you'd see that it just...
TIM SHAW
It deforms.
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
Yeah, okay.
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
Go straight across it now at 90.
TIM SHAW
Like that?
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
Oh it's rigid.
WILLIAMS RACING WORKER
Very rigid.
TIM SHAW
So you continually have to be thinking about the forces being applied to the car, and then lay this stuff in different orientations, to make sure that it is strong in that direction.
NARRATOR
When laid up by the experts, carbon fibre is superior to metal at withstanding the high stress loads created by racing at over 200mph. And if that wasn't impressive enough, in a sport where every gram counts.
NEIL
That's the metallic version.
TIM SHAW
Good God.
NARRATOR
Carbon fibre can be up to five times lighter than steel, making cars faster and more economical on fuel.
NEIL
Right Tim, what would you like to make?
TIM SHAW
What a great question. The whole car.
NARRATOR
But with a kilogram of high end carbon fibre costing 100 times as much as steel, I think that's a bit ambitious Tim.
TIM SHAW
You've got front end carbon fibre here. We've got those, but those are quite readily available. The roof, I know you'd need the car here, our car here.
NEIL
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
And I can get that wrapped actually, in a carbon fibre. Believe it or not, there are two choices around the back. The bit that I happen to know because I've built many CSL reps myself, the tricky bit is the diffuser. So I'm wondering, how would we make one of those?
NEIL
Well, we need to scan it, so we need to bring Julie and Chloe in to do the scan.
TIM SHAW
No way. What's that?
NEIL
Fantastic piece of kit.
TIM SHAW
Oh, wow.
TIM SHAW
And is that, oh, look at that already. It's building up an image of that thing instantly on the screen. What are we seeing happening here?
NEIL
So it's scanning all the point data at the moment and the reverse engineering, and then creating it on screen.
TIM SHAW
It looks like it's just a video feed. So that looks like a video camera just sending video pictures. But that's a virtual recreation of the back end of the car, isn't it? From what, millions of points that it's picked up.
NEIL
Millions of point, yes.
TIM SHAW
Is it pretty accurate?
NEIL
It's very accurate. I mean, to 0.7mm.
TIM SHAW
And how's that looking? I mean, that looks bang on.
NEIL
It's fantastic. Julia, we're nearly there. Nearly have a CSL bumper. Tim!
TIM SHAW
What? What, is that? Oh are they?
NEIL
Tim, thanks very much for coming down.
TIM SHAW
Okay.
TIM SHAW
Thanks, guys. Thanks for having me. I probably won't meet you guys again, but lovely to meet you. Stick it in the post when it's done, yeah? Cheers, man.
NARRATOR
While the team at Williams try to iron Tim's mug out of Ricky's new diffuser, back at Car SOS headquarters, with the subframe now strengthened, its foot to the floor on the CSL transformation. The body's off, having a coat of sapphire black paint applied, and the engine rebuild is almost complete.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
We've put fresh new bearing shells in and a lovely new timing chain, but we still have to fit the VANOS unit onto the front of the camshafts here.
NARRATOR
So while Fuzz gets to grips with that.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
That's a thing of great joy for me because I'm a nerd.
NARRATOR
One of Britain's best rappers has popped by the workshop. No, it's not Stormzy, it's Dan who's got the tacky task of applying the CSL lookalike carbon fibre style wrap to the roof of the M3.
NARRATOR
The engine and gearbox are being reunited and put back into the car. And look what's arrived from Williams Racing, thankfully, minus Tim's mug.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Here we have a rear bumper and that lovely carbon fibre diffuser. Right, come on, let's get this off. So now we have to get it in here without scratching the rest of the body.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Get a nut in place.
SPEAKER 8
You're up.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right. That looks a whole heap better. There's still plenty of work to do, though.
NARRATOR
Yes, it's all mechanics to the M3 to get Ricky's CSL lookalike ready for the big reveal. And with bonnets and body panels going back on, even Tim's getting his hands dirty.
TIM SHAW
Time to put the centre caps into the CSL alloys. Now, a little trick for you, which is one of these things, I guarantee you will use it. Line up the M or the middle of the badge with the with the tyre inflator, so you no longer will have that problem of like, oh, I need to put air in the tyre and I can't find the inflator. Where is it? It disappears into the dark. So, line it up with the M there. And there you go. You always know where the tyre inflator is.
NARRATOR
And with that, Rick's car is almost ready to go. Apart from the antique in the boot. No, not Fuzz.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Tim, come and have a look at this.
TIM SHAW
What is it? What have you found?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
[LAUGHS] You'll love it.
TIM SHAW
Oh, I know. Oh, no. Yes. What's he listening to? What's Rick, yo, it's like, it might as well be mine. Ibiza classics.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
[LAUGHS] Brilliant.
TIM SHAW
Dude, that is so cool, man. Man, I love this car. You know, what we've done to it, think about the bomb that we had dropped on us.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
It looks great. And to anybody just seeing it on the street as it goes past, they'll just glance at it and go, oh, a CSL, I saw a CSL today.
TIM SHAW
Right, tomorrow. Come and sit down with me. I want to share something with you, right.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay.
TIM SHAW
Tomorrow is a big day for Ricky.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yes. I'm sure. Have you worked out something special?
TIM SHAW
And it's a big day for you as well.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
For me?
TIM SHAW
Yes.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay.
TIM SHAW
You and Ricky share something in common. You both have love of British comedy.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
That's right. Well, I work with a comedian all the time.
TIM SHAW
Do you? Who's that? Anyway, look, you share the love of the same guy.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh. No, you didn't.
TIM SHAW
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait. It's not just a video message. Tomorrow, if everything goes to plan, we're going to have a very special guest there. And you will not just be at the back of a comedy venue waving and going, hello, I'm Fuzz, do you watch Car SOS? You don't watch.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Are you sure? Are you sure there's not going to be, there's going to be some, there's always something.
TIM SHAW
No. No. You will meet your hero, and Ricky will as well. And we'll give Ricky his car back.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
You're not joking?
TIM SHAW
No, I'm not joking. It's a done deal.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Okay. Fantastic.
TIM SHAW
Shall we get it finished?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
Go on then. Let's get it back to Ricky. Wow.
NARRATOR
After months of hard work, the boys have returned to Nottingham with a very special surprise for Rick.
TIM SHAW
Bring it in, Fuzzbot. Bring it in, son. Oh, look at that. Sapphire black, duck-tail CSL, mate, that is the best looking M3 I have ever, oh dude.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Doesn't it look amazing?
TIM SHAW
Oh, dude.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
It does look absolutely amazing. Anyway, look, come on. What I want to know, look, you said.
TIM SHAW
What?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
That my favourite comedian was going to be here. Where is Johnny Vegas?
TIM SHAW
Wait for it. Rick lives around the corner from here.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
This is his mate Glyn's house.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
Rick has no idea. He's got the day off today.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Right.
TIM SHAW
When the time is right, our comedian is going to knock on random doors around here, pull some regular punters in to play street bingo. One of them's going to be Rick, and he's going to win this car.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Hold on, hold on. Wait, just backtrack a little bit, because at no time have you mentioned Johnny Vegas's name? Where is he?
TIM SHAW
Do you want the truth?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Yeah, I do want the truth. 
JOHNNY VEGAS
[LAUGHS]
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, I've wanted to meet you for so long.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Honestly.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh. That's amazing.
JOHNNY VEGAS
He wrote me a letter and I just scanned it, and I saw your name.
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, fantastic.
JOHNNY VEGAS
It's you, it's you. What are you doing in this?
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Oh, this is.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Can we get. Johnny? Hello? Can we get the car hidden? And can we get you in character?
JOHNNY VEGAS
Of course we can, Tim. Because you said so.
NARRATOR
Yes, whilst the new best friends get acquainted with each other.
TIM SHAW
Fan boy or what?
NARRATOR
The set is in place, the neighbours are in on the surprise, and now they just need to get Rick to take part in Johnny's entirely fictitious new TV series.
AL
Hello.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Hiya. He's been nominated, he needs three people now to come and play street bingo.
GLYN
Yeah, and I thought of you.
RICK
Yeah, yeah.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Are you sure?
RICK
Yeah.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Right, please. Come on.
NARRATOR
So far, so good. Rick is playing along and remains completely unaware of what's really happening.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Rob and Al.
NARRATOR
And with Tim tucked around the corner, and the car out of sight, it's over to you, Johnny.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Hello. Welcome to another episode of Johnny Vegas's Street Bingo, coming to you from Nottingham. Round one. What does paying for accommodation in Yorkshire have in common with Nottingham? 
ROB
T'rent.
JOHNNY VEGAS
T'rent. Correct.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Right, ibuprofen was discovered in Nottingham. But why are there no headaches in the jungle?
JOHNNY VEGAS
Al?
AL
Cause the paracetamol.
AL
Correct. 
NARRATOR
At the end of round one. Ricky has zero points and zero clue about what's really going on.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Right. Put your blindfolds on.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Can you tell me to your closest guess, blindfolded, the make of the next vehicle that is about to pull up on this yard here? Listen now.
JOHNNY VEGAS
The name of the vehicle. Glyn?
GLYN
That sounds like an Audi to me. Oh.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Rob.
ROB
Ford Focus.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Ford Focus, really?
JOHNNY VEGAS
Rick?
RICK
That is a BMW. Straight six.
JOHNNY VEGAS
Right. Can I turn you all round, kind of clockwise. Gentlemen, take your blindfolds off while I announce the winner.
RICK
Oh my God.
TIM SHAW
Hello mate.
RICK
That's my car.
TIM SHAW
That is your car. 
FUZZ TOWNSHEND
Recognise that?
RICK
It's changed.
TIM SHAW
You know all this street bingo thing?
RICK
Yeah.
TIM SHAW
All of this was all a ruse. It was all a scam, just to get you here, to give you your car back.
RICK
Amazing.
TIM SHAW
You all right?
RICK
It looks incredible.
TIM SHAW
Can we bring out Rick's family as well, please? Come on out, guys. Come on out. He didn't have a clue. [LAUGHS] Come on, come on, come out. Give him a cuddle. Amy, come on.
AMY
[LAUGHS] 
TIM SHAW
It's all her fault, Rick.
RICK
Oh my God. 
TIM SHAW
Amy, can you explain to your lovely man here, can you explain why it is you wrote to us? Don't talk to me, forget all of that. Just talk to Rick.
AMY
Because you've been through so much, like, for a couple of years now. Covid, chemo, lymphoma. We just wanted to give you something back, something nice that we all know that you absolutely love, and something we can all cherish forever as a memory.
RICK
Lost for words.
AMY
And we love you. Love you so much.
TIM SHAW
Can we have a round of applause for Rick and his M3? [APPLAUSE] That's your car, mate.
RICK
It's unbelievable.
TIM SHAW
It's not sinking in yet, is it?
RICK
It's still not sinking in.
NARRATOR
When Rick last saw his beloved M3, it had been struck down by the big three problems that send these BMWs to the scrapheap in the sky.
NARRATOR
But thanks to the boys' hard work, it's been reborn. Not only are the mechanical issues no more, but Rick's got himself the car of his dreams. On the outside, there's CSL touches like the one of a kind carbon fibre rear diffuser built by Williams, new wheels, a spoiler and carbon fibre wrapped roof. Inside, there's a brand new CSL style Alcantara covered steering wheel. And finally, the whole thing has been resprayed sapphire black. Let's just hope he didn't want silver.
TIM SHAW
So tell me this, black?
RICK
Oh, gorgeous. Gorgeous colour.
TIM SHAW
Did we get it right?
RICK
Perfect. Best colour I think you could have chosen. Honestly.
TIM SHAW
How does it feel to be back in it?
RICK
Amazing. Absolutely amazing. Can't believe it.
TIM SHAW
You've been through a lot, dude. Still going through a lot. Amy just wanted to do, and Brent wanted to do something for you, cause they love you.
RICK
Sorry I can't.
TIM SHAW
It's alright. And they figured that this car might be the trick to putting a smile on your face.
RICK
It has. Definitely.
TIM SHAW
What is it about an E46 M3 for you Rick?
RICK
It's just a pure driving experience. You're connected. It's like strapping on a car.
TIM SHAW
Yeah.
RICK
Not sitting in a car. You're putting it on. You're wearing it.
TIM SHAW
Mate, you've just put in words exactly what I've been trying to get into words for my 20 years since I've owned these cars. Can we talk about what happened to you when you got diagnosed? How does it change you?
RICK
It makes you think about life more. I'm lucky I've come out the other side. I'll never be cured, but.
TIM SHAW
You're here. 
RICK
I'm here. So you just appreciate every moment.
TIM SHAW
Well, there is only one thing left to do, and that is that is to thank you for making the decision to buy an E46 M3, the greatest car in the world. So you have been Car SOS-ed.
RICK
Thank you very much. Things like this don't happen to me, you know? It's just unbelievable.

AMY
So what do you reckon then?
RICK
It's my dream car, isn't it, the CSL? I've always wanted one of these. I love it.
AMY
It's great.
RICK
I bet him there thinks we're driving a real CSL.
AMY
I bet he does.
RICK
He wouldn't know.
AMY
Well, he wouldn't know, would he? 
RICK
He wouldn't have a clue. What a surprise, Amy. I can't thank you enough for doing this for me, You done me good. You done me proud.
AMY
Oh, you deserve it.
AMY
Woohoo, what a day. So now you can go floor it.
RICK
Let's go.

###