BRUCE_BANNER CAROL_DANVERS DOCTOR_STRANGE HOWARD_STARK JARVIS NARRATOR NATASHA_ROMANOFF PETER_PARKER SHURI STARK STEVE_ROGERS THOR TONY_STARK ULTRON WALLA YOUNG_TONY NARRATOR On Christmas Eve, as snow fell across New York city, a figure in red streaked across the sky. A bag of gifts slung over his shoulder. And though it was webbing that carried young Spider-Man and not a reindeer-pulled sleigh, he was no less full of Christmas spirit than Santa Claus himself. THOR Ha! PETER PARKER Avengers Tower on Christmas Eve, the next best thing to the North Pole. PETER PARKER Captain America. I guess they don't call you "The Star-Spangled Avenger" for nothing, huh? STEVE ROGERS Spider-Man. Welcome. Glad you could swing by. NATASHA ROMANOFF Don't distract him. The Captain's gonna lose his title if he can't get that star straight. PETER PARKER Ah, don't sweat it, Black Widow. PETER PARKER I can always web the star into place for you? SHURI Higher. BRUCE BANNER SHURI Mmm. Higher. BRUCE BANNER SHURI Uh, too high. BRUCE BANNER I'm a nuclear physicist, not an interior decorator. PETER PARKER Hey, Shuri. Hey, Hulk. Love what you're doing with the lights. PETER PARKER Thor. Wow, how many Avengers are coming tomorrow? This table is ready for a feast. THOR Uh, do you think so, friend Spider-Man? Verily, with this, the mighty halls of Asgard, such a dining display would hardly be fit to feed one hungry warrior. PETER PARKER I think we'll be fine for an Earth meal, Thor. Don't sweat it. PETER PARKER Monitor duty, Captain Marvel? I guess some danger never rests, not even on Christmas Eve. CAROL DANVERS It's actually a pretty silent night, Spider-Man. I'm just keeping an eye on the Santa tracker. You never know when he might need us to pitch in and help deliver a few presents after all. PETER PARKER Wait, seriously? CAROL DANVERS PETER PARKER Anyway, uh, where's Iron Man? CAROL DANVERS Probably at his factory. Tony says he feels "extra productive" this time of year when everyone else is "distracted" by the holidays. We hardly see him around Avengers Tower during the Christmas season. PETER PARKER Do you think Mr. Stark would mind if I used his workshop to make sure I've got all my gifts ready for tomorrow? CAROL DANVERS I doubt he'll even notice. Knock yourself out, kid. PETER PARKER I think Mr. Stark would definitely mind if I knock myself out in his lab. PETER PARKER Okay. Giant sized mittens for Hulk, check. Spider-themed friendship bracelet for Black Widow, check. Where did I put the... TONY STARK What do we have here? An elf in Santa's workshop? PETER PARKER Mr. Stark! TONY STARK Gifts? For little, old me? You should have. PETER PARKER Christmas isn't until tomorrow, Mr. Stark. No spoiling the surprise. TONY STARK Fine, fine. That sack's so small. Let me guess. You whipped up some cutting-edge, new spider-tech for the Avengers. Something only the Web-Head could think of? PETER PARKER Oh, uh, there's actually nothing that fancy in here. I went a little more sentimental this year. TONY STARK Oh. So a bunch of stocking stuffers, huh? Yeah, I guess every Christmas needs some little knickknacks you forget about a week later. PETER PARKER Uh... TONY STARK I went all out this year. I got the team a full Stark rebrand. From the tip of Shuri's claws to the feathers on Cap's head wings. Every inch of the Avengers is going to scream Iron Man. New logos, new color schemes, and much shinier metallic finishes. PETER PARKER PETER PARKER I guess my gifts are pretty simple compared to all of that. PETER PARKER I, uh, need to see if I can spruce up my gifts so they're as good as yours. I'll see you tomorrow, Mr. Stark. TONY STARK Sure thing, kid. But don't try too hard. It's not easy to compete with the best! PETER PARKER Mmm. CAROL DANVERS You know, you can be a real scrooge sometimes, Tony. TONY STARK What's that suppose to mean? I'm super generous. Look at all the amazing stuff I've invented for the Avengers. I'm always creating the coolest new things. STEVE ROGERS Christmas isn't about the gifts. You've missed out on all the time we've spent together decorating and looking back on the year. TONY STARK Yeah, that all sounds wholesome, Cap, but some of us have to do real work around here. THOR Forsooth, friend Anthony. This is no way to make merry this fine holiday. TONY STARK It costs a lot of money to have a holiday this fine, Thor. BRUCE BANNER Oh, it's going to cost you all right. NARRATOR Once upon a time, of all the good days in a year, on Christmas Eve, Iron Man sat busy in his workshop. TONY STARK I don't know what got into everyone earlier. My gifts are going to be the most awesome presents under the tree tomorrow morning, and I'll I'll prove it to... to him. NARRATOR As he worked late into the evening, his eyes grew heavy and his head drifted down toward the desk. Before sleep overtook him, Iron Man received a visitor. TONY STARK Huh? TONY STARK Uh, little early for the Christmas party, Doctor Strange. DOCTOR STRANGE This is no time for festivities, Iron Man. Though I respect you deeply as a friend and fellow hero, I can see that the magic of the season has been lost on you. And that has grave consequences that can affect the fate of the Avengers forevermore. TONY STARK Huh? DOCTOR STRANGE I fear that it is my duty as Sorcerer Supreme to ensure you do not forget the true spirit of Christmas. TONY STARK Don't you think you're being a little dramatic? DOCTOR STRANGE You will have three opportunities to confront the errors of your ways, Anthony Stark. If you cannot learn from these avenging visions, you will be cursed to bear your heavy armor alone. TONY STARK TONY STARK But I already wear my armor alone! NARRATOR When Iron Man reappeared, he had the oddest sense of familiarity as if he had been to this place, but not for quite some time. TONY STARK Whoa! TONY STARK Whoa. TONY STARK Mmm. TONY STARK Strange? Where'd you go, buddy? TONY STARK And why does everything look so old school? STEVE ROGERS This is your life, Tony Stark. There is nothing old school about a trip down memory lane. TONY STARK Steve! Ugh, you won't believe the wild stuff Strange was going on about. Avenging visions and all that. He was really earning his name, if you catch my drift. TONY STARK Uh, why are we at the old Stark Industries building though? STEVE ROGERS Look around, Tony. Doesn't this day feel familiar to you? STARK TONY STARK It feels like any other day. YOUNG TONY Do you have to go into the office today, Dad? It's Christmas! HOWARD STARK If great inventors didn't put in the hard work, we wouldn't have the breakthroughs that led to heroes like Captain America. YOUNG TONY But the presents! HOWARD STARK Who knows, if you work just as hard, maybe you'll change the world one day too. YOUNG TONY And the parade on tv? HOWARD STARK Now just sit tight, we'll be back in plenty of time for all those Christmas festivities. YOUNG TONY Mmm. TONY STARK Dad? Dad, is it really you? STEVE ROGERS Howard Stark can't hear or see us, Tony. We're only visitors to this scene. TONY STARK I do remember this day now. STEVE ROGERS You never did make it to your family's Christmas that year, did you? TONY STARK So he got a little carried away in his lab and we were six or seven hours late to the party. So what? The convertor upgrades that he invented that day were a huge win for the company. STEVE ROGERS Hmm. TONY STARK Listen, Cap, Christmas comes every year. Who knows when you'll have a stroke of genius? STEVE ROGERS Do you think that would bring comfort to the little boy sitting on the curb over there? Waiting to spend time with his father on Christmas day? YOUNG TONY TONY STARK That kid just doesn't understand the way the world works yet. And you wouldn't even have that shield to wave around if scientists, like my dad, didn't put in long hours in the lab. STEVE ROGERS No. I suppose I wouldn't, would I? TONY STARK Hey! Watch where you're swinging that thing! STEVE ROGERS I was frozen in the ice for a long time, Tony. Don't let your heart get encased in ice too. TONY STARK Hey! Wait! What are you-- NARRATOR Iron Man shut his eyes tight, willing himself to open them and discover that he was back in his workshop, this entire ordeal finished. TONY STARK Thank goodness that's over. Time to get back to Asgard? NARRATOR That was not to be the case. TONY STARK No one called for a rainbow bridge. How'd I get all the way to Thor's hometown? Huh? THOR You've come for the feast after all, friend Iron Man. TONY STARK Ugh, man, you're a sight for Thor... I mean, sore eyes. But what feast are you talking about? THOR Christmas may not be an Asgardian holiday, but Asgard never turns down a chance to celebrate great warriors and even greater friends. See for yourself. WALLA THOR Truly, no finer gathering of heroes may be found this side of Valhalla. TONY STARK Shuri, Natasha, you've got to help me break whatever spell Strange put on me. It's been a real lump of coal in my stocking. TONY STARK Uh, hey! Avengers. TONY STARK Why the frosty shoulder? THOR You're as invisible as the icy winds of Jotunheim to our fellow Avengers, my armored friend. It's not time for them to hear you but for you to hear them. CAROL DANVERS I don't think Tony would even know it was Christmas if we didn't decorate the tower. There's not an ounce of holiday cheer in that armor. BRUCE BANNER TONY STARK That's ridiculous. jarvis keeps a very thorough calendar for me. SHURI Eh. Perhaps, that is for the best. If he were more active in the festivities, our tree would be covered in Stark logos instead of Christmas lights. Oh, and the star would be replaced with a picture of Tony's face. STARK NATASHA ROMANOFF Why have a tree at all? We can just replace it with one of his spare Iron Man suits, programmed to tell us all how great he is over and over again. At least the empty seat would show up when we invited it to join us. SHURI TONY STARK Hey, that's hardly fair. I show up to every team meeting... eventually. PETER PARKER I know Mr. Stark would be here if he could. He's just working really hard to give all the Avengers the best gifts he can. We'll see once he finally does show up. He's going to be the most festive of all of us. I bet he'll have a brand new suit of Santa armor and everything. TONY STARK The kid really stood up for me there, didn't he? I didn't even know you were all planning to go to Asgard on Christmas day though. I would've let him down. THOR You were invited, friend Iron Man. TONY STARK I'm sure I got busy with something important. WALLA CAROL DANVERS You. How did you get past Sif and the Warriors Three? STEVE ROGERS Ultron, if you think we're gonna let you ruin Christmas, you've got another thing coming. ULTRON Bah, humbug. SHURI Asgard is a place of magic. They must not have detected a robot. And without Iron Man's senses, neither did we. TONY STARK No. BRUCE BANNER Oh, that stings. ULTRON It's time to deck the halls with your defeat. PETER PARKER CAROL DANVERS I don't think so, Ultron. You're on my naughty list. WALLA ULTRON The only present I seek is ultimate destruction. NATASHA ROMANOFF This is getting us nowhere. We need someone who can hack into Ultron's systems. PETER PARKER I can try. And if nothing else, I can keep him busy until Iron Man gets here. TONY STARK Wait, kid, don't! PETER PARKER Sorry, Ultron. I didn't ask Santa for an evil robot. Hope he kept the receipt. TONY STARK No. PETER PARKER Whoa! ULTRON There are no returns. THOR Do you forget, friend Anthony, how important you are to the Avengers? You are not there on the field of battle alongside your fellow warriors. Who knows what fate may have in store for the team? TONY STARK It looks like the team had Ultron handled, right? I'm sure they did. Come on. I've seen the Avengers beat Ultron a dozen times. We don't need to stick around and watch it again. THOR If he be worthy, Iron Man. But this night will end better than it began for you. TONY STARK Is that some sort of Asgardian riddle-- Whoa! NARRATOR Upon his third trip through the portal, Iron Man still clung to the hope that perhaps his trial had finished. After all, he seemed to be back where he began. But where he began was not at all what it once was. TONY STARK Finally. Home sweet home. Avengers Tower. TONY STARK Uh, is anybody here? How long did Strange's weird little spell sweep me away for? TONY STARK Hulk. Ouch. But also, what a relief to see a friendly face. Well, a grumpy face, anyway. TONY STARK Uh, earth to Bruce Banner. What's the matter? Loki got your tongue? Seriously, where's the Christmas tree? TONY STARK Where are all the gifts? Is this some kind of prank? Did the other Avengers hide everything while I was out? Very funny, ha ha ha. BRUCE BANNER This is the Christmas to come for Iron Man. There are no more Avengers left. First, you left us alone against Ultron. Then it was Thanos, then Kang. Then Doom. BRUCE BANNER One day, the Avengers don't win without you there, Iron Man. TONY STARK But I... I was probably off inventing something to help them. And the team still had Steve, and Carol and-- BRUCE BANNER But the team isn't just Steve or Carol. The team is everyone. Now Iron Man's alone in a big empty tower full of big empty suits. But at least you've got lots of time to work. TONY STARK TONY STARK Come on. You're telling me the Avengers fell apart because I couldn't get into a holiday the right way? BRUCE BANNER It's not about the holiday, Tony. It's about the meaning of the holiday. But if you don't get that, you can look forward to your solitude. NARRATOR Everything Iron Man had witnessed this night swirled through his mind. How he had learned at a young age, to put work before all else. How his friends often missed his presence and might suffer for it. And the darkness that could lie ahead should this path continue. He came away with an important conclusion. TONY STARK Hulk! I like being an Avenger. I don't wanna be the reason the team falls apart. Being the best inventor or the coolest gift-giver isn't worth losing all of my friends. BRUCE BANNER Let's hope you're truly a changed man then. TONY STARK TONY STARK NARRATOR And so, for the final time, Iron Man opened his eyes to find himself transported. He was, at last, returned to where his journey began. And he knew exactly what he must do. TONY STARK TONY STARK Was all of that just a dream? You know what, it doesn't matter if it was real or not. TONY STARK Jarvis? Forget shipping over those tacky new branded gifts I had made up for the Avengers. Instead, I want you to send out every extra pair of armor in the workshop to deliver food and toys to the city shelters. Courtesy of Tony Stark. JARVIS Of course, sir. TONY STARK And have One bring a big feast over to Avengers Tower. We need to celebrate right. JARVIS Of course, sir. TONY STARK Oh, and be sure to give yourself a raise too. JARVIS Oh. Of course, sir. TONY STARK Merry Christmas, Avengers! BRUCE BANNER Hmm? TONY STARK It is still Christmas, right? I haven't missed it? CAROL DANVERS Tony? Have you been replaced by a shape-shifting Skrull? TONY STARK I'm not a Skrull, but you were right about me being a scrooge, Carol. And now's my chance to fix it. TONY STARK And you know, Shuri, that idea about Stark-branded Christmas trees isn't half bad. But I think I prefer the classics. SHURI Wait, wait, wait. How did you-- TONY STARK And, Natasha, I don't need my suits to tell me how great I am. I just need to be surrounded by my friends to feel that way. NATASHA ROMANOFF Are you spying on our thoughts, Tony? TONY STARK Just call it a hunch. TONY STARK Cap. Thor. Hulk. I can't thank the three of you enough. I don't want my heart to be frozen over. I wanna be worthy of my friends. And I need to be a changed man. STEVE ROGERS Uh, did that make sense to either of you? THOR Mmm? BRUCE BANNER Mmm? TONY STARK Oh. And, Thor, tell your buddies in Asgard to keep an eye out for evil robots. STEVE ROGERS Huh? DOCTOR STRANGE I'm sorry I'm late, everyone. There was unrest in the Dark Dimension. TONY STARK You came right when you needed to, Doc. Thank you. NARRATOR Finally, arriving with some nervousness, came the guest Iron Man had been hoping to see most of all. PETER PARKER Hey, everyone. Merry Chris-- TONY STARK Hey, Web-Head. Just the guy I've been waiting to see. PETER PARKER Oh, uh. Hi, Mr. Stark. Hope I didn't miss all the cool expensive stuff you made for everyone. TONY STARK Hey, forget about that. I was all wrong about Christmas. None of that junk matters. PETER PARKER Really? In that case, here's your gift, Mr. Stark. Meeting you for the first time, meant a lot to me. So I had this framed. I know it's not much, but... TONY STARK No, kid. It's everything. It's the best gift I could have asked for. Really. TONY STARK I want to thank all of you. Especially Spidey here for reminding me that Christmas isn't about trying to outdo each other with extravagant gifts. Or spend the most money. Or lock yourself away in a lab and pretend the holiday doesn't exist. PETER PARKER TONY STARK It's about spending time with the people who matter the most to you. And showing them why they do. Although, some of the new branding I designed was really cool. DOCTOR STRANGE Tony. TONY STARK Right, right. Anyway... Let's have the merriest Christmas on earth, Avengers. PETER PARKER Yeah! NARRATOR Iron Man was better than his word. He did it all and infinitely more. He became as good a friend, as good a hero, and as good an Avenger, as the earth ever knew. And it was always said of him that he knew how to keep Christmas well if any Avenger alive possessed the knowledge. STEVE ROGERS Hey. SHURI Ah. NARRATOR If you assemble this Christmas, may you celebrate it as well as the Earth's Mightiest Heroes.