BLUE_DIAMOND BLUE_PEARL DEFENSE_ZIRCON EYEBALL LARS PROS_ZIRCON STEVEN YELLOW_DIAMOND YELLOW_PEARL STEVEN i know my mom did something really bad. whatever homeworld has in store for me…i’m ready! i said, i’m ready! it’s me! rose quartz! helloooo? anybody? lars? are you there? is this the punishment? come on, i know it’s going to be worse than this! so whatever you’re gonna do, would you just do it already? DEFENSE ZIRCON ugh! this is ridiculous! 4,000 years of loyal service to the court and this is what i get? oh, i’m the unluckiest zircon in the galaxy! wait… are you…rose quartz? STEVEN yeah. DEFENSE ZIRCON really? STEVEN it’s—a long story. DEFENSE ZIRCON then i don’t have time for it. ugh! we only have this brief moment to prepare your case. STEVEN case? DEFENSE ZIRCON ugh, who am i kidding? this is pointless! we’ve all heard the rumors about the demise of pink diamond, but i can’t believe these files: shattered by one of her own soldiers – ugh – in front of her entire entourage! and look at you now! that ridiculous disguise is only going to make you look more guilty! STEVEN that’s fine, because i am! DEFENSE ZIRCON wuh- don’t say that! especially not when you’re out there! STEVEN out where? what’s going to happen? DEFENSE ZIRCON what did you think was going to happen, rose quartz? as soon as that door opens, you’re going on trial! STEVEN om. PROS ZIRCON defending a rebel? isn’t that…treason? DEFENSE ZIRCON i was assigned to this! YELLOW PEARL all rise for the luminous yellow diamond! BLUE PEARL and the lustrous blue diamond… BLUE DIAMOND where is…the accused? YELLOW DIAMOND is that…rose quartz? look at this hideous form she’s taken. forget the trial. we should shatter her just for looking like that. BLUE DIAMOND no! i want to hear her make her case. i want to know what she thinks we’re going to do with her because i want to do something worse. YELLOW DIAMOND fine! let’s just get on with it, shall we? PROS ZIRCON my diamond. my brialliant, opulent, radient, glimmering- YELLOW DIAMOND “my diamond” – will suffice or we’ll never get through this. PROS ZIRCON of course, my diamond. rose quartz committed a crime so unprecedented, – that one can’t help but wonder – why? exhibit a! STEVEN lars! LARS steven! what’s going on here?! where are we?! who are those…huge…giant ladies? PROS ZIRCON as we can see from this…specimen— LARS hello? wait…wait a minute! hello? PROS ZIRCON humans are loud, absolutely hideous- LARS hello? get us out of here! PROS ZIRCON creatures that serve no purpose whatsoever. LARS can uh-can anybody hear me? PROS ZIRCON what sort of gem would turn on her own kind for this? i’ll tell you what kind…that kind. STEVEN just let him go! he’s got nothing to do with this! PROS ZIRCON there it is…the passion, the fury…that caused the diabolical rose quartz to… shatter her own diamond! but i know what you’re thinking!…this thing doesn’t look like a rose quartz. and for that i would like to call an eye witness! EYEBALL agh. STEVEN oh! eyeball! EYEBALL do not address me, war criminal! STEVEN i’m just glad you’re okay. EYEBALL i heard it straight from her, she said, “i’m the mighty rose quartz. i’ve got her shield and everything.” and then…she threw me into space! STEVEN i tried to help you! i healed your gem! EYEBALL and who else has the ability to heal gems other than the villainous…rose…quartz! PROS ZIRCON and there you have it! rose quartz did it and that’s rose quartz. i rest my case. DEFENSE ZIRCON ah, she’s good. YELLOW DIAMOND well, i’m convinced! time to execute! BLUE DIAMOND not yet. the defense still has to speak. PROS ZIRCON right! well uh…before i start my very uh, thought out, defense i’d like to remind the court that rose quartz did turn herself in… YELLOW DIAMOND the court remembers and the court does not care. PROS ZIRCON uh, of course, uh…in-n-innocent! uh, the word innocent can mean, oh, many different things- STEVEN i did it. DEFENSE ZIRCON wh-wh-what! stop! BLUE DIAMOND no! i want to hear what she has to say. LARS get us out of here, steven! YELLOW PEARL state your name for the record please! STEVEN i…um…i am rose quartz…and…i’m guilty. DEFENSE ZIRCON wait! no, don’t say that! STEVEN everything you guys said i did…i did. and i did it by myself... i’m sorry. i’ll accept any punishment you want to give me. just let him go! and leave the earth alone. YELLOW DIAMOND hah! sounds like a solid confession to me! BLUE DIAMOND how…how did you do it? BLUE DIAMOND how did you shatter pink diamond? STEVEN umm… well… i did it on earth - in front of pink diamond’s palanquin. i was probably like ‘stop!’and she was all like ‘no!’ so we fought – i think. and…she probably did some cool moves. i probably did some cool stuff too, some jump kicks and stuff. but i was most likely deeply conflicted about deciding to shatter her. defintely crying. i probably had to use the breaking point to do it… BLUE DIAMOND it was a sword! you shattered her…with a sword! YELLOW DIAMOND that’s quite enough testimony from you. we shall take a short recess. DEFENSE ZIRCON what are you saying in there?! “maybe” this! “probably” that!? ah, what do you mean probably?! STEVEN look, i just—i don’t actually know how it happened, okay? DEFENSE ZIRCON you don’t know? STEVEN i… DEFENSE ZIRCON don’t tumble my rocks! both our gems are on the line! did you do this or not! STEVEN it was me, all right! rose quartz did it and i’ve got her gem, so i’m the one who’s gotta pay for this! DEFENSE ZIRCON you don’t know how it happened… i get it… there’s a reason they want you to explain how you did it. STEVEN huh? DEFENSE ZIRCON it’s because it doesn’t make sense! DEFENSE ZIRCON rose quartz is flawed, i grant you. a shallow strata gem who turned on her own kind out of a misguided attachment to a planet and creatures like these. LARS what?! huh?! DEFENSE ZIRCON it’s indisputable that as the diamond overseeing earth pink was rose quartz’s enemy. rose had everything to gain by shattering her. but even though she may have wanted to shatter pink diamond… could she? blue diamond, for the purpose of this argument, may i present your palanquin? YELLOW DIAMOND is this necessary? BLUE DIAMOND isn’t it? please…proceed. DEFENSE ZIRCON now, as the records show, pink diamond was shattered just outside a palanquin much like this. witnesses said, pink had stepped out and had taken only a few steps forward, when rose attacked her from the front. BLUE DIAMOND oh! DEFENSE ZIRCON the question no one seems to be asking is…how. BLUE DIAMOND i’ve been asking that question. DEFENSE ZIRCON a-a-and right you are to ask, my diamond! b-because, at the time that pink was shattered, rose quartz had been a recognized threat for several hundred years. there were no rose quartz soldiers in her entourage, and none in her guard… so how did a rose quartz, with no business being anywhere near pink diamond, get so close in the first place? where were pink diamond’s attendants? her agates? her sapphires? and where was her pearl? YELLOW DIAMOND they were with her, of course. they saw the whole thing! DEFENSE ZIRCON but none of them saw rose quartz approach? wouldn’t her sapphires have seen rose quartz coming? wouldn’t her agates have tried to fight her off? STEVEN that is strange! YELLOW DIAMOND she must have slipped past them! DEFENSE ZIRCON even if she did – wouldn’t her pearl have cried out in alarm, “waaatch out, my diamond!” no. whoeveer did this was already close to pink diamond…someone her guards would allow to get near. someone she would listen to when asked to stop her palanquin and step outside…and someone with the authority to cover it up afterwards! DEFENSE ZIRCON someone with supreme authority! someone…like one of you! DEFENSE ZIRCON uh, disregard that last statement, i might have gotten carried away – PROS ZIRCON case closed, right, my diamond? ahhh! BLUE DIAMOND yellow, stop it! why are you doing this?! STEVEN this is our chance, we gotta go! LARS where? YELLOW DIAMOND we don’t need to listen to this nonsense! STEVEN there! YELLOW DIAMOND let’s shatter rose quartz and be done with it! BLUE DIAMOND can’t you restrain yourself?! YELLOW DIAMOND but this is pointless! BLUE DIAMOND no it’s not! LARS hurry up and drive this thing! those giant crazy chicks aren’t gonna be distracted forever! where is this… STEVEN homeworld. YELLOW DIAMOND you think you can get away, rose? you stood your ground on that little speck called earth. but you’re on our world, now.