AMETHYST BUCK BUCK_DEWEY CROWD GARNET GREG GUARD_1 GUARD_2 JENNY KIKI LARS MAYOR_DEWEY PEARL RONALDO SADIE SOUR_CREAM STEVEN STEVEN pearl! amethyst! garnet! wah! PEARL you don’t have to yell, steven, we’re right here. STEVEN i know, but i finished this drawing, and i wanted to show it to you! PEARL oh uh, of course. STEVEN alright… hup! haha! guitar dad teaches you… guitar! AMETHYST what is that? STEVEN it’s my dad! he’s going to start teaching guitar lessons, and he made me his pr department! AMETHYST what’s that stuff in his mouth? STEVEN those are his teeth! PEARL what are the lightning bolts for? STEVEN uh. well-i, i was trying to show that dad really rocks on the guitar, and-- GARNET then there should be rocks falling out of the guitar. STEVEN i hear what you’re saying but, it’s too late for notes. this is permanent marker. mm-hmm! SADIE what’s that cute flyer for, steven? STEVEN it’s for my dad! he’ll teach you guitar! you guys wanna sign up? my dad’s really good! SADIE maybe i’ll stop by and check it out! STEVEN here, lemme give you a flyer and-- SADIE welcome to the big donut! STEVEN hey, buck! LARS oh! what? buck, buck, buuuuuuuuuck! ha ha! what’s going on, man? what can we get for you today? BUCK can i get a caprese salad? SADIE oh, sorry buck, we onle serve do-- LARS do-nut worry buck! i’ll whip you up a salad! no sweat! i’ll be right back! SADIE lars, we don’t even have vegetables here! BUCK heh… what’s a guitar dad? STEVEN like my flyer? it’s for my dad! he’ll teach you guitar! here, take one of these with you! actually… just wear it! BUCK hehehehehe… STEVEN are you ticklish? BUCK this would make a rad shirt, man. STEVEN really? BUCK yeah! let’s make your flyer into t-shirts! STEVEN oh, man! my dad would love that! BUCK gimme five on it. oh, y’missed. MAYOR DEWEY ho! i think it’s swell you’re returning to the family business, son! gonna help the old man get re-elected again, eh? aw, son! BUCK hnnng… ugh. it’s not for campaign stuff, dad. steven and i are making art. STEVEN art! MAYOR DEWEY art, huh? i don’t understand it myself, but, a boy’s got to have interests and ambitions! BUCK STEVEN this stuff can be used to make t-shirts? MAYOR DEWEY oh yeah, i’ve got all the latest, state-of-the-art screenprinting equipment from years of campaigning, and other some such mayorly things. like this week, i’m commemorating a bench! STEVEN welcome to…. bench city? thrifty! dad, you can’t use this! MAYOR DEWEY why not? you know, i gotta gank dat youth vote, boyeeeee! BUCK dad, stop. STEVEN what’s this? what have you got there ? i haven’t seen this in years! remember when you drew this, buck? you couldn’t wait to show it off to all your little montessori friends. BUCK ok dad! thanks for all your help see you later bye. MAYOR DEWEY all right, kids! i mean, peace in the middle east, holmes! STEVEN so cool. BUCK let’s just get started already. STEVEN wah! ugh! BUCK swag. STEVEN now everyone’s gonna want lessons from dad! BUCK this is bigger than your dad, steven. it’s art. and it’s gonna flood the public consciousness. STEVEN let’s start handing them out! BUCK too simple. we need to get controversial. we need to create… boom! a scene. STEVEN scanning for targets. t-shirt cannon loaded and ready! beep, beep, beep…bibibibi! sour cream sighted! SOUR CREAM wom wom… wom wom wom. STEVEN get ready! take aim! BUCK DEWEY and… SOUR CREAM womp womp womp womp! what in the world? oh…this is the coolest thing i’ve ever been hit in the head with. STEVEN ronaldo spotted. take aim! RONALDO woah! what the heck?! huh? woah! weird… some kinda extraterrestrial space dad guitar shirt? so, you’ve finally decided to make first contact, huh? where are you?! STEVEN lars sighted. take aim! LARS youch! what the… what is this garbage? buck made this?! this is hilarious! thanks buck! STEVEN cheers! buck! this was such a good idea! i dunno why we didn’t collaborate on a project sooner! this’ll make my dad so happy! i can’t wait to see the look on his face when i stop by later! BUCK yeah… should be good for a laugh. STEVEN huh? why would it be good for a-- JENNY girl! check out my new shirt! KIKI it’s really cute! where’d you get it? JENNY i-unno… it just landed in front of me when i was out walkin’. KIKI well, if i were you, i wouldn’t wear some random shirt that just fell out of the sky. what if there were bugs in it? JENNY relax! who cares where it came from? this shirt is the funniest thing i’ve seen in my life! BUCK looks like our shirt has a really good buzz goin.’ STEVEN yeah…but… i think they think it’s a joke? BUCK heh. the only thing that’s important is that they’re talkin’ about it. that’s how real art works. STEVEN oh, well… i-i guess you’re right. GREG uhh… how’s this? SOUR CREAM hahaha… so bad. GREG okay! let’s get started with the first lesson! have a seat and grab a-- where ya going? oh…uh… heh! i guess he got an important text or something! STEVEN how’s it been going today? GREG really great! lots of people have been coming by, thanks to your t-shirts, little guy. STEVEN that’s great, dad! i’m really glad i could help y-- JENNY yoo-hoo! guitar dad! just wanted to say i think you’re wonderful and hilarious! GREG uh…thank you? huh. that’s kinda strange. STEVEN what is? GREG well, lots of people have stopped by, but…no one’s taken a lesson yet. STEVEN what? really?! GREG ah, maybe they’re just checking out the scene before they come back to get a real lesson! STEVEN buck! BUCK hey, there’s my main man. STEVEN the shirts aren’t working, buck! BUCK yeah they are. people love ‘em. STEVEN but, nobody wants guitar lessons from my dad! BUCK that’s not the point. STEVEN what? then what is the point? BUCK the point is, it’s an amazing shirt. STEVEN aww, my drawing’s not that good. hehe. BUCK yeah, no. it’s terrible. STEVEN what? BUCK that’s what’s so great about it. your work is so naïve. you really love your dad. it’s funny. STEVEN i-- i don’t want to make these shirts anymore. BUCK too bad, steven. it’s so current, you can’t stop it. i’m a taste maker, and i’m gonna keep making tastes… forever. STEVEN forever? BUCK well, forever, after i go to my dad’s lame bench commemoration. peace. STEVEN garnet! pearl! amethyst! GARNET steven! PEARL what is it?! AMETHYST woah, where’s the fire?! STEVEN it’s an emergency! you have to help me get rid of all the shirts and stop buck from making more! PEARL have the shirts come to life and possessed the bodies of their wearers? STEVEN eh? no, they just-- AMETHYST are people catching on fire when they put on the magic shirts? STEVEN no…no, th-they’re just… PEARL are the shirts destroying the wearers’ wills to continue on in this mortal coil, thereby shutting down beach city?! STEVEN no! they’re…eh, they’re just using my art in a way i don’t agree with! PEARL oh. GARNET eh, we’ll pass. STEVEN what?! but…but, i really need your help! PEARL steven, this sounds like a very abstract problem. AMETHYST it’s not something we can punch. GARNET you must learn to help yourself. that’s how you become stronger. AMETHYST good point, good point. PEARL oh, absolutely. STEVEN but! AMETHYST figure something out, steven! PEARL yes, why not dust off those conflict resolution skills! GARNET let your problem be known. then you can work towards an understanding. STEVEN oh…i’ll make him understand. i’ll make them all understand! AMETHYST eh, he’ll be fine. MAYOR DEWEY okay. is everyone here? hello! i was supposed to write a speech to…um er…uh, commemerate this, uh new bench, but what had happened was i ran out of printer ink in my printer that i keep at home. so, i went to the store and wouldn’t you know it? they didn’t carry the brand i was looking for so… STEVEN bye. MAYOR DEWEY i called up a buddy of mine who owed me a few GUARD 1 look out! GUARD 2 woh! ahh! MAYOR DEWEY oomph! CROWD MAYOR DEWEY i’ve been… shirt! CROWD MAYOR DEWEY buck… did you make this? JENNY this shirt is genius! hahaha! JENNY this is way funnier than guitar dad! LARS MAYOR DEWEY this bench is actually pretty comfortable. STEVEN anyone else stop by for lessons today? GREG so far, no… but, i’m sure it’ll pick up tomorrow! STEVEN yeah, i’m sure it will. this is for you, by the way. this is the last one, so it’s super limited edition! GREG aw, sweet! thanks, steven! BUCK yo, steven, just...wanted to say... uh… i’m sorry for what i did… and… uh… STEVEN it’s ok, buck. you don’t have to say any more than that. BUCK you’re a cool cat, steven universe. hey, mister u? GREG you wanna take a picture with me, or some junk? BUCK no way, man. i want a lesson…. from guitar dad!