CAT EYEBALL GRIZZ HIPPO IBIS ICE_BEAR JACKAL MANAGER MUMMY NARRATOR PANDA NARRATOR wow, this place is dry. just looking at that sand is making me parched. NARRATOR Hope those bears brought some water, or juice, or... whoa dirty laundry? GRIZZ Wooo! Well Sock World was definitely a 4- out-of-5 stars kinda place. PANDA It would’ve gotten that fifth star if it weren’t for, all these disgusting socks. ICE BEAR ice bear’s bo is v-b-o, very bad odor. GRIZZ I dunno, smells good to me! ICE BEAR Ice Bear shall bathe like the birds. ICE BEAR Cheep cheep. PANDA i want to take a real bath. ICE BEAR Box says: “Over yonder dune of sand, you’ll find relief is close at hand.” GRIZZ Whoa... I bet there’s a secret labyrinth in there full of dangerous traps and cursed treasures! Or at least some cool doohickies. PANDA Only one way to find out. PANDA Guys...wait for me... GRIZZ Aw maaan, this is just a boring bathroom! No thanks, I’m gonna go back to dehydrating in the desert. PANDA it’s not a bathroom, it’s a spa! GRIZZ Uh-huh, what’s the difference? PANDA spas are like theme parks but for relaxing! You can rest and rejuvenate, all your worries can wash down the drain. ICE BEAR Ice Bear believes in self care. GRIZZ nope. it sounds like a bath and baths are the worst. all you do is sit and scrub. sit n’ scrub, sit n’ scrub. and then you have to do it all over again the next day! PANDA Then how do you get clean? GRIZZ Oh! Once a year I coat myself with this! Gorilla strength industrial degreaser! PANDA Hmmmm...Wait...Once...a year? PANDA Three towels, please! MANAGER “place thine heart upon the scale, lest ye be judged to pass or fail-” whoa what is that smell? GRIZZ ahem. this is a finely crafted artisanal fragrance!!! MANAGER ugh please! just go take a bath! PANDA free spa! ICE BEAR Ice Bear ready to get nude and rude. MANAGER Get out of my sight and away from my nostrils. PANDA This place has everything! Hot tubs, cold tubs, herbal tubs. ICE BEAR Ice Bear wants to try spicy noodle tub. PANDA Well first things first, we gotta scrub all this sock stench off. To the bubble tub! PANDA It looks positively delightful. GRIZZ yeah, no. i’m gonna go find something actually fun to do. GRIZZ hey! wha- oof! what the heck! PANDA Grizz, you gotta take a bath! ICE BEAR Ice Bear concerned for brother’s health. And health of Ice Bear’s nose. GRIZZ This is a violation of my personal hygienic rights! PANDA Hey! GRIZZ Sorry bird guy! Sorry hippo lady! Sorry cat person! PANDA Grizz! MANAGER wha...what is the meaning of this ruckus? ah you! MANAGER You sir, are ruining everyone’s bath time. CAT take a bath! take a bath! IBIS take a bath! take a bath! HIPPO take a bath! take a bath! GRIZZ Huh? GRIZZ Aha! GRIZZ Yoink! CAT Ah! GRIZZ Haha So long, Soap Soakers! MANAGER Ugh let’s find that little stink bug before he contaminates my whole bath. HIPPO He called us Soap Soakers. PANDA Wanna try the fruity yogurt bath? ICE BEAR Ice Bear ready to soak. GRIZZ This is way better than lying around in a tub and getting all wrinkled. CAT I can smell him, this way! GRIZZ Oop, gotta find a more secure hide-and-seek spot, but without the seeking part. GRIZZ Huh? Bingo was the hide out’s namo. GRIZZ Hmmmm...I’m a baby and I can’t read that! EYEBALL Hngrrhgh. GRIZZ Oh, hi there lil’ guy! Any room in there for me? EYEBALL Hngrrhgh. MUMMY hhhrrnghrgghhhaaa!!!! GRIZZ aaaah!! mummy! MUMMY Hngrrhgh. GRIZZ Me thinks me have messed up. MANAGER I have you now stinky bear. MANAGER There you are you little- MANAGER Aaaaah! CAT Huh? IBIS Huh? HIPPO Huh? JACKAL No! Get it off me! PANDA is that a mummy? in an ancient egyptian themed bath house?! what are the odds. ICE BEAR ice bear does not want to meet that in a dark alley, or in a brightly lit spa. PANDA aaaah! ICE BEAR aaaah! PANDA The stench...*gag...it’s paralyzing... GRIZZ Stop! Why’s it doing that?! MANAGER That mummy refused to take a bath and reeked havoc on my bath house. So we locked it away so that nobody could ever smell that foul beast ever again. And now it’s been released and ruining my business. I’ll never get my heath code back up. MANAGER I’m sorry, Papa... I have failed you. GRIZZ oh no, it’s my fault the spa is ruined, i gotta reverse the curse! but how? MANAGER the only way to reverse the curse is to bathe the mummy. but it’s un-bathe-able i’ll tell ya! GRIZZ I can’t smell a thing... that’s right, I’m immune to all major stenches! GRIZZ Nothing’s un-bathe-able. MUMMY Huh? GRIZZ Let’s rumble, you filthy fiend! GRIZZ AH! Blegh, Sock World all over again. Can nothing clean this heaping pile of stinkin’ laundry!? The Gorrila strength industrial degreaser! MUMMY hghgr. PANDA You gotta get in there, Grizz! ICE BEAR Scour those soiled scrubs. PANDA Bathe that brute! PANDA it’s not the soap that does the cleaning, it’s the scrubbing! the scruuubbbiiinnggg. GRIZZ but that means i’ll have to take a bath. GRIZZ sit n’ scrub, grizz. sit. n. scrub! GRIZZ Time to take you for a spin cycle, bay-bee! MANAGER Huh? GRIZZ Ahhhh. MANAGER Papa would be so proud... MUMMY I am proud, my child. MANAGER Huh?! MUMMY Oh uh...I mean... Muuaaaaaauuuuuggghhhh PANDA grizz! ICE BEAR grizz! PANDA You really saved our smelly butts! And our nostrils. And, uh, our whole bodies...? ICE BEAR Ice Bear thinks you’re the bomb. The bath bomb. PANDA And don’t you feel calm and relaxed after taking a bath? GRIZZ calm!? no way! that bath got me more fired up than ever! GRIZZ But I am sorry for being such a selfish jerk earlier. I promise to take more baths... As long as they’re action packed and filled with high stakes! MANAGER Yeah, yeah, very nice. Now get outta here before you unleash any more curses that threaten the integrity of my business. ICE BEAR Haha integrity haha. NARRATOR You know what they say: cleanliness is next to godliness, so our bears must be next in line for deification! That is unless they get themselves into another messy scrape...which...honestly will probably happen sooner rather than later...