APPLE CRAB_CAKE DUCK_BOAT ONION PIZZA TEMPURA_SHRIMP TUNA_CAN ONION Ahh, it’s so nice to live in a city with a harbor. APPLE Yeah we can go on the water cars whenever we want! ONION Boats, Apple. APPLE Haha, boats. How d’you know so much about the ocean, anyway? ONION Well I used to live by the sea with my parents. And I always loved it. ONION And with the aid of modern science and confectionary manufacturers my lifelong problem of seasickness is not a problem! Seafarer’s Sidekick! APPLE Mad skills. APPLE Knot mad skills. Cause it’s a knot. Shall we go home for lunch now? ONION Yes, but first I’m going to tell you something very amazing. APPLE As amazing as lunch? ONION Did you know the Crescent Moon Whale is making its once a decade migration south as we speak? APPLE What about beans on toast? ONION One of the rarest whales on the planet will pass right by this very region tonight. APPLE I think I’m gonna have melted cheese on mine. ONION I’ve always wanted to catch even a small glimpse of its majestic beauty. APPLE I might put some chili powder on as well. ONION What a thrill to look at it eye-to-eye, one of the biggest eyes of any mammal. APPLE Spicy. CRAB CAKE Pardon me. Were you guys talking about spotting the Crescent Moon Whale? ONION Yes. But how can one spot it- If it’s already spotted! TUNA CAN TEMPURA SHRIMP CRAB CAKE APPLE What’s everyone laughing about? ONION Oh sorry Apple. See, the whale has spots on its skin. CRAB CAKE My, you do know a lot about the Crescent Moon Whale. TEMPURA SHRIMP We’re the Maritimer Whale Trackers- an elite and exclusive club. TUNA CAN We’re really brainy and ingenious. CRAB CAKE I’m Crab Cake, this is Tempura Shrimp, and Tuna Can. We’ve been tracking the Crescent Moon Whale for years and this year we’ve finally acquired all of the proper equipment to help us “spot” it, haha. It’s not every day we meet someone with the same expert degree of sea knowledge as us. TUNA CAN We’re very smart. CRAB CAKE How would you feel about joining our club and coming with us tomorrow to see- APPLE Spot. Haha. CRAB CAKE Yes. Spot- the whale. ONION Yes, absolutely! That would be amazing! TEMPURA SHRIMP Maybe you have what it takes to be one of us- a Maritimer. TUNA CAN Not like that landlubber! PIZZA TEMPURA SHRIMP He should probably go grab his Seafarer’s Sidekick! ONION Seasickness! Haha. Oh no, Onion, make a good impression. I hope Apple sees I’m holding the mints behind my back for him to grab and hide! APPLE I can’t hear what he’s thinking but I think he doesn’t want these people to know he gets sick. I understand. APPLE Mad skills. ONION Mad skills. ONION But yes! We would love to join your club and see the whale! CRAB CAKE You have to pass an initiation to get in, of course. TEMPURA SHRIMP Weeds out the posers and shows that you’re worthy to join our ranks. APPLE We’re gonna go on your water car!? ONION Apple, what are you doing? APPLE I can’t hear what Onion’s thinking but it probably has something to do with water car. What’s the proper name for it though? ONION It’s boat, Apple. APPLE I can hear you now! Goat! CRAB CAKE Welcome to our club house. Only a select few- us -have graced these rooms and passed their initiation. APPLE Even Tuna Can? TEMPURA SHRIMP His dad owns the boat. TUNA CAN Okay! Let the init-ish nn ni-shn… TEMPURA SHRIMP Initiation. TUNA CAN Begin! TEMPURA SHRIMP Marine. CRAB CAKE Biology. TUNA CAN Knowledge. CRAB CAKE Now Onion, simply identify the sea creature. ONION Easy, that is a narwhal. CRAB CAKE Correct. Apple, identify the sea creature. APPLE Hmmmmmmmmm. CRAB CAKE Apple? APPLE Okay okay, don’t tell me, don’t tell me, don’t tell me, don’t tell me- CRAB CAKE I wasn’t gonna tell yo- APPLE Don’t tell me!! ONION Atlantic wolf fish. Japanese spider crab. Giant isopod. Pacific viper fish. APPLE Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… ONION Mediterranean monk seal, Bathynomus doederleinii but that’s now extinct. You’ll see to update your chart! APPLE HmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMM sea unicorn mermaid! CRAB CAKE You’ve got to be kidding me. APPLE What, how is it not u- …sea unicorn mermaid? TUNA CAN Ocean survival. TEMPURA SHRIMP Ocean survival. CRAB CAKE Ocean survival. CRAB CAKE The ocean can be a rough and unforgiving place if you get washed up ashore. Sometimes there’s nothing around but sand. TEMPURA SHRIMP Show us how you will eat to survive. ONION I’m imitating the rain. TUNA CAN Ohohoho, you ain’t got a landlubber’s stomach! ONION Not…not at all. TUNA CAN Navigation skills. TEMPURA SHRIMP Navigation skills. CRAB CAKE Navigation skills. CRAB CAKE Turn one step windward! Now take two steps leeward and then head belowdeck! ONION Hm! APPLE I’m in a goat! CRAB CAKE Turn one step windward! APPLE Windward, how about a real word? TUNA CAN Initiation results! TEMPURA SHRIMP Initiation results! CRAB CAKE Initiation results! CRAB CAKE Onion, you have proven yourself truly worthy of joining our Maritimer Whale Tracker Club. ONION I’d like to say something now. I can’t believe that only this morning, I didn’t even know that such a group of like-minded people existed. Now I’m one of you and I want to tell you that it is a very huge and enormous honor. Thank you for allowing me into your club and for giving me the chance to see the whale of my dreams. CRAB CAKE What can I say, Apple. How about I start with your ineptitude and incompetence. APPLE Is that like incredible and ingenious? TEMPURA SHRIMP Are you kidding? You’re nothing but a poser! TEMPURA SHRIMP Hey guys, do we let posers into our club? CRAB CAKE We certainly do NOT let posers into our club. TUNA CAN What a poser! APPLE I’m not a poser! I was just doing it to hang out with my friend Onion! ONION Mm-mmm, ONION Where’s your hat? APPLE I didn’t get in. Come on, let’s go eat beans on toast with chili powder on top. And melted cheese! ONION Wait, what do you mean let’s go? I got in! APPLE What? Who cares about this club and their stupid whale. Come on, let’s go home. ONION I care Apple. And excuse me, but it’s not a stupid whale. APPLE I can’t BELIEVE you’re on their side!! ONION What are you on about? Look, if you’re just jealous that I got in and you didn’t-- APPLE I’m not jealous of you and those snobs! CRAB CAKE Come on Onion! Time to get on the boat! APPLE Forget it, see you later. TUNA CAN The Crescent Moon Whale! TEMPURA SHRIMP The Crescent Moon Whale! CRAB CAKE The Crescent Moon Whale! CRAB CAKE Onion! Come and look! CRAB CAKE A-Are you feeling okay? ONION Oh yes, I’m fine. Just enjoying the waves, back, and- -Forth. Excuse me for a moment. TEMPURA SHRIMP He should probably go grab his Seafarer’s Sidekick! ONION Oh no. APPLE Oh hello worm. Don’t worry, I’m not gonna eat you. I’m having beans on toast. I’m not gonna betray you, like Onion betrayed me. Hello, I’m Onion and I’m a betrayer. The whale ughhh, got-got spots on it, ughhh. APPLE I can’t believe he picked those horrible snobs instead of me. Aha, Onion’s Seafarer’s Sidekick. APPLE That snobby club’s gonna kick Onion out before he sees his whale! But that’s not my problem. Yeah, well, he shouldn’t have left me! CRAB CAKE It’s fifteen knots away and migrating this way. You’re about to be part of history, Onion. How do you feel? ONION Sick ONION with excitement! Sick with excitement! Ehhhheheh. I’d like to see the whale from the railing outside if you don’t mind, ehehhh. Bleehhhhhh! Urgh. Ha… Hm? ONION Apple! What are you doing here? APPLE I brought your Seafarer’s Sidekick! ONION You pedaled all the way over here to give me my- Thank you! APPLE Well have fun with your new friends. Good. Bye. ONION Apple, wait! CRAB CAKE Wait, Apple? TEMPURA SHRIMP We told you, you aren’t good enough to be a Maritimer. Go home poser! APPLE I am going home! CRAB CAKE The whale’s moving, we gotta move too! C’mon Onion! TEMPURA SHRIMP The whale, Onion! CRAB CAKE I said come on, Onion! Say goodbye to the poser. ONION Goodbye… ONION Maritimers! CRAB CAKE Excuse me? ONION You said he was a ‘poser’? Well then, guess what? I’m a poser too! TEMPURA SHRIMP Seafarer’s Sidekick? TUNA CAN A landlubber! CRAB CAKE Onion, what’s going on here? ONION I’ve been seasick this entire time. I threw up over there, and over there, and over there. TUNA CAN Really? TEMPURA SHRIMP Ewww. CRAB CAKE Well, Onion. I don’t know if we can let you see the whale, then. ONION I’d rather NOT see the whale with my real friend than SEE the whale with you three! CRAB CAKE yeah? well we don’t want you in our club anyways! ONION Hmph. And I also threw up in your hat! CRAB CAKE Come on, let’s get out of here. APPLE Are you alright? ONION Yes. But stomach-wise, no. APPLE Here, take your Seafarer’s Sidekick! ONION Apple, I very am lucky to have you as a best friend. I was blinded by the whale and couldn’t see that the Maritimers were elitist snob heads. I’m sorry they made fun of you. APPLE Hm? Look! The little fish are eating your vomit! ONION It’s the…it’s the…it’s the APPLE Crescent Moon Whale ONION Crescent Moon Whale ONION I can’t believe it! I can’t believe we saw it! It must have been our true friendship that attracted the whale! APPLE Oh not it was just all the fish eating your vomit. DUCK BOAT quack.