ALL FEMALE_WITH_LONG_BLONDE_HAIR_IN_BLUE_JUMPER FUZZ_TOWNSHEND JAMIE JOHN LEIGH MALE_IN_BLACK_CAP MALE_WITH_WHITE_BEARD NARRATOR RICK STUART TIM_AND_FUZZ TIM_SHAW UNKNOWN_MALE_WITH_SHORT_GREY_HAIR NARRATOR Today, on Car SOS, dyed in the wool petrol head, Tim Shaw. TIM SHAW I love this car. Absolutely, it's just stonking. NARRATOR And mechanical maestro, Fuzz Townshend. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Oh,do you know, I love the smell of gearbox oil. NARRATOR Are once again on their undercover mission to rescue classic cars for deserving owners. This time, the boys take on a faulty French masterpiece. TIM SHAW This engine, it was the Achilles' Heel of this car. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Don't you want me to do that? I'm a bus mechanic, you know. NARRATOR Fuzz struggles to master a tin opener. TIM SHAW Is anybody listening to me? NARRATOR Tim has to go long distance to find parts. TIM SHAW This is Tim Shaw from Planet Earth. NARRATOR And the stage is set to make another automotive dream come true. UNKNOWN MALE WITH SHORT GREY HAIR This is like all your Christmases in one, isn't it? MALE IN BLACK CAP It's gotta be one of the best days of my life. NARRATOR Today, Tim and Fuzz are heading south to find a car that's out of this world. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So here we are in lovely Kent. TIM SHAW I've got my Inspector Gadget eye up, man. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Why's that? TIM SHAW Because today we're going deep undercover, picking up a car which is frankly one of the most incredibly ahead of its time cars ever made. FUZZ TOWNSHEND That's right, because today, we are picking up. TIM AND FUZZ A Citroen SM! NARRATOR Utterly original and unambiguously French, this charismatic grand tourer was in fact a collaboration between Citroen and Italian super car manufacturer, Maserati, which may help explain its otherworldly styling, superb comfort and growling 3 litre [UNIT CONVERSION 5.27926 pints] V6 engine, that could pull nought to 60 [UNIT CONVERSION 96.56064 km] in 8.5 seconds and reach a top speed of 137 miles [UNIT CONVERSION 220.480128 km] an hour. It was even a surprising success in motor sport, winning the Morocco Rally in 1971. The SM was also choc-a-block with futuristic technology, such as hydro-pneumatic self-levelling suspension, self-centring steering, swivel-head lights and automatic rain sensitive windscreen wipers. The interior of the car was pure luxury. In short, the SM ticked every box in the book, apart from its unfortunate timing. As, in 1974, just four years after its launch, Citroen went into administration and was bought up by Peugeot. In the end, just 13,000 SMs had rolled off the production line, nothing like it had come before and nothing like it came after. It was beautiful, complicated and mysterious. Mind you, there's nothing mysterious about the one the boys are off to see. It's quite plainly knackered. TIM SHAW I genuinely believe that this car was designed by people that weren't from this planet. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW What's funny? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Designed by aliens? TIM SHAW Yes, I do. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS]. NARRATOR Well, ET or not, today's SM belongs to 58 year old building surveyor, Stuart, who bought it 18 years ago as a scrapper. He spent countless hours trying to get this most complicated car to showroom condition. However, just as the light was at the end of the tunnel, catastrophe struck and sadly, it wasn't just his beloved car where it all went wrong. TIM SHAW They need a mode of transport, let's build the Citroen SM, but let's hide in there some things that nobody else has done, ever. FUZZ TOWNSHEND And. TIM SHAW Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Let's make it really reliable. TIM SHAW Yeah, and also. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on, let's not do that. [LAUGHS]. NARRATOR It was Stuart's wife, Leigh, who wrote to Car SOS, in the hope that getting him back behind the wheel of his car might give him the boost that he so badly needs. TIM SHAW This is a bit off the beaten track, Fuzz. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So it is, yeah. TIM SHAW A little bit bit Area 51-esque. TIM SHAW Hello. LEIGH Oh, [LAUGHS], hello. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Hi, how you doing? I'm Fuzz. LEIGH Hello. Nice to meet you. TIM SHAW Right, what's this place and where's Stuart? LEIGH So this is a classic car storage facility. TIM SHAW Right. LEIGH Where Stuart thinks his car has come here for safekeeping. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So he's not likely to turn up at all? LEIGH No, not at all, he's miles away. TIM SHAW Alright, let's go, come on, let's go and see. Okay, lead the way. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Wow, look, there's that glazed in front there. Iconic. Outwardly, it doesn't look too bad. So what's the story with the car? Why's it not on the road? LEIGH There are a few things missing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Hold on, you looked at the bonnet, that means, we're talking about something down here. TIM SHAW 2.7 V6 Maserati engine. Oh. Well, it's just a hole. LEIGH Well, sadly, Stuart just about managed to get it all together in the car. TIM SHAW Yeah. LEIGH And he drove it for a few miles and it just blew. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, we're talking about a catastrophic failure. LEIGH A major catastrophic failure, the whole thing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right. The big question is, where is the engine? LEIGH Basically, here it is. [LAUGHS]. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So that pile of parts is some of the engine? LEIGH Yes, good luck. [LAUGHS]. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right. TIM SHAW Come with me, come on, let's go and have a chat about Stuart. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, so the engine's gone bang, so let's take a look and see what we've got here, we've got the main components here to see if we've got any clues as to what has happened. So, we've got pistons and con rods here, I can see, oh, wait a minute, look, is that, that's broken off, that bit there. So we've got a broken bit there. Oh, wait a minute, hold on, here we go. Now that is a catastrophic failure. So, this piston has seized in its bore, but the engine's continued rotating and the con rod has pulled out of the piston, just completely broken off. If that is the thing that went ka-bang, there may be no going back from this. TIM SHAW What kind of guy is he? LEIGH I think in an ideal world, he probably would have been a, he would love to have been a car designer, 'cause he loves cars. TIM SHAW Okay. LEIGH I mean that was, he always said to me, "Oh, I wish I'd done that", but. TIM SHAW Has he got the disease when he likes something? LEIGH He loves them, yes, all sorts of cars. TIM SHAW How long's he had it? LEIGH He's had it for 18 years. TIM SHAW Right. LEIGH So, he bought it as a complete wreck, I mean, it was just a sort of pile of rust that arrived. [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW Did he really? [LAUGHS]. Right, alright. LEIGH I just went, "Oh, my goodness, what have we got now?" FUZZ TOWNSHEND All over, I can see little scratches, probably where it's just been chipped, but who knows? We might not have to paint this car. I'm not certain, though, don't hold me to that one. Now, the interior, well, it's partially complete. The seats seem, to be intact, at least they're there and that's good. I did notice a rip in the driver's seat and I can see some other bits of interior trim around there. So I'm hopeful that we have everything that we need inside. And you'll notice that the car is slammed down on the ground at the moment. And that's because the engine has to operate the pump, which charges these spheres and charges the whole of the hydro-pneumatic suspension system. Without the engine working, without that pump, it just sits on the deck. If we don't have the engine working, we can't really test that, not very easily. Ah. We've got some parts. Yes! Carburetors, neatly stored bolts, there's bound to be something missing, but we'll have to find that out. TIM SHAW So he's got this car, this rust bucket? LEIGH Yeah. TIM SHAW And he's working his way through it. LEIGH Yes, when he doesn't feel great, he'll go into the garage and fiddle around with the car for hours on end. TIM SHAW Right, so it's a therapy? LEIGH It's a therapy for him. He absolutely is in heaven. He comes back in to the house and he's as happy as Larry. TIM SHAW But it was running. LEIGH But it was running, we were a few miles down a country lane and it just went. He was so upset. TIM SHAW What did he do when it went bang? LEIGH That was it, he just said, "I've had enough." TIM SHAW But that wasn't all that went wrong, was it, with Stuart? LEIGH No, no. He had to have major heart surgery. Basically, he had to have a new valve put in. It was very scary, actually, because it was, especially it was during COVID and so you couldn't even go into the hospital, like, I had to leave him at the front door of the hospital, it was awful. Took a long time for him to recover. TIM SHAW What was happening in terms of work? LEIGH I mean, he only had one client during COVID, who sadly passed away, but he had to just keep going. TIM SHAW Major surgery, having parts of his heart replaced. LEIGH Yeah. TIM SHAW His work went to pot as well and the one client he had died. LEIGH Yeah. LEIGH So this man's world was completely and utterly turned upside down. LEIGH Yeah. Just think, oh, for goodness sake, it's gotta get better. TIM SHAW What's next? LEIGH Yes, what's next? But. TIM SHAW Well, what is next is we get him in his car more than 2 miles [UNIT CONVERSION 3.218688 km]. LEIGH God, that would be amazing, it would be the greatest joy, I think it would be all his Christmases come at once. TIM SHAW Shall we go and see how Fuzz is getting on? LEIGH Brilliant. TIM SHAW Alright, come on. TIM SHAW Right, Fuzz, oh, no. Look at that face. LEIGH [LAUGHS] /. TIM SHAW That's not a happy boy, is it? What's up? Come on. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Well, look, okay, right, the engine, it is an absolute catastrophic failure. So we don't know if we can even save that engine. TIM SHAW Are you finished? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Get pushing then, come on, I'm ready. TIM SHAW Come on then. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, come on then, stop messing about, let's get out of here. TIM SHAW This is amazing. Right, we're gonna get it out of here. LEIGH Right. TIM SHAW How's it feel? LEIGH Very emotional. TIM SHAW Come on, give us a cuddle. LEIGH Aw. TIM SHAW We'll get out of here before you change your mind. FUZZ TOWNSHEND See you later, Leigh, take it easy. LEIGH Thank you. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Alright, see you. LEIGH Bye. TIM SHAW Bye. LEIGH Good luck! FUZZ TOWNSHEND So the engine's blown, it's in pieces. I mean, most of it's in the boot, I didn't realize they were rear engined. TIM SHAW [LAUGHS]. NARRATOR So, Fuzz has his misgivings. But back at the Car SOS workshop, there's no getting away from it. This complicated car could be a budget buster. TIM SHAW Come on, let's get underneath it. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay. Come on then. TIM SHAW First, Fuzz, whoa, whoa, whoa, listen, just, a quick word in your ear before we go onto that. I don't want you to worry about what you're about to see under here. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Get off. Let's just get underneath, come on. TIM SHAW Just bear that in mind. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. TIM SHAW 'Cause this has been designed by people not from this world. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, so, they designed in delamination rust there. Oh, rusty exhaust. TIM SHAW Well, yes, there were a few disposable bits like that, but look. Look at the condition of it. Have you ever been underneath anything so old? 50 plus years old. But look, on the side, it's like new. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Let's look at reality here. We've got a greasy wheel, so we've got a hub seal that's gone here, I reckon. TIM SHAW A greasy wheel? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, or maybe even the brakes have gone. TIM SHAW Oh, come on, what else is wrong with it? So far, you've found a rusty exhaust and a greasy wheel. It's unbelievable. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Stuart's picked a good car. Well done, Stuart. Come on, let's continue having a look. Right, so, yeah, rust is not our enemy here, but what is, is that great big gaping hole up here, where the engine should be. And we know that that engine needs to be rebuilt. TIM SHAW Yeah, this engine has major, major problems. It was the Achilles' Heel of this car. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, well, it's the Achilles' Heel of this one, that's for sure. We may get that going again, but then we might find a whole raft of other problems with this car. This is not gonna be simple. NARRATOR Tim and Fuzz have taken on a 1973 Citroen SM, a car they know very little about. Apart from the fact, that it's riddled with unique and quirky engineering, none of which can be tested out until the engine's back in the car. So, time to put out their own SOS call and bring in Jamie, one of the very few SM experts in the country, who, hopefully, will be able to help. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Wanna come and see the patient? JAMIE Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Come on then. TIM SHAW Alright then, so what are we looking at here? I mean, to us, this is all, it's all alien to us. JAMIE The first thing that's screaming at me is these oil cooler pipes. TIM SHAW Yeah. JAMIE These are the old original fabric covered ones. They're prone to splitting. TIM SHAW Right. JAMIE Most SMs, if not all of them by now, have been upgraded to stainless steel braided ones, 'cause these were prone to leaking. It's just an indication that no one's done maintenance, upgrades, anything to make this car better than it left the factory. If they haven't been done, nothing else is gonna have been done. TIM SHAW What's that broken bit of plastic there, that white [PHONETIC giblet]? JAMIE Oh, that's for the steering headlights. So, yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Alright, so that's why they're pointing inwards at the moment? JAMIE It's why they're slightly boss-eyed. When they're all connected, they'll point in the right direction. But that's the least of your problems, to be fair. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, so I need to get the engine away somewhere nice, quiet and clean, because we've gotta be absolutely meticulous with that engine. TIM SHAW And I'm being left everything beyond the engine to work on. JAMIE That's your two categories. TIM SHAW Yeah, right. JAMIE It's the engine and everything else. TIM SHAW That's great, brilliant. NARRATOR So, like the car itself, this time, the whole project is gonna be quite different, because until that Maserati V6 engine is rebuilt, refitted and fired up, we have no idea what, if anything, is actually working. NARRATOR One thing we do know is that the car's interior, once so luxurious, is now ripped and tatty. Those leather seats in particular will need to be mended and fully restored. NARRATOR And then there's that unique Citroen suspension system. Instead of conventional springs and shock absorbers, this car has a pump that forces fluid into mysterious green spheres. NARRATOR If this is in any way faulty, we're in big trouble. But once again, we're not gonna know until the engine's plumbed back in. So to start with, we'll just have to take onboard Jamie's advice and replace the 50 year old hoses and pipes and tackle anything else we can do, while we're waiting to see if that catastrophically damaged engine can be brought back to life. And for that, we'll need the second of our world class experts. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So I've got the engine from the Citroen SM, that little Maserati V6, in the back of the car now., so I'm on my way to our old friend, Rick Wood. NARRATOR Yes, race car builder, Rick Wood, might eat blown up engines for breakfast, but with hundreds of dismantled bits in boxes, even he might be left scratching his head. RICK Alright, Fuzz. FUZZ TOWNSHEND How's it going? RICK Yeah, good, mate. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Come and have a look, see what we've got for you. I think this one might be a little bit touch and go. RICK Wow. Is this a complete engine? FUZZ TOWNSHEND I dunno. It might be. What do you reckon? RICK It's a very rare thing to have bits missing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS]. Right, okay. RICK Let's get it in, laid out and let's see what looks like it's missing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, go on then. RICK Okay. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, here you go. You have that one and I'll start here. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So, here we've got it, the Maserati V6 engine, as fitted into the Citroen SM. Now, a lot of people think that this was like a sawn off V8, but that's not the case, is it? RICK No. it was a dedicated, genuine Maserati engine. Not the best engine back in the day. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, a highly strung sports engine, yeah. RICK That's the one. Yeah, and with many flaws. We really need to address those problems that they had. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, so, I guess, lack of maintenance and a couple of design flaws got in the way? RICK Absolutely. Especially the valves, being sodium filled and that's what has caused the catastrophe here. Basically, the valves had a reputation for the heads falling off. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Oh, right, okay. RICK Piston comes up, hits it, bend, bend, bend. Bend the rod and basically, it just caused, like a bomb's gone off in the cylinder. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK Now we'd just use a stainless steel valve, one piece, a lot of these were two piece valves as well. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, oh, okay. RICK They're friction welded together, so, it's doomed by design. We've learned a lot in 50 years. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. Why use sodium filled valves? RICK So basically, it's a hollow stem. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK And it's for, especially on turbo engines, trying to keep the valve cooler. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay. What's the next stage? RICK Next stage is to clean it all up, measure it. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK Kind of dummy build everything and make sure we've got every nut and bolt, 'cause if we haven't, we can get stumped by just a specialist bolt. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So even the tiniest missing part could become a major headache. RICK Always. NARRATOR Oh, dear. And what with those unique engine parts, like pistons and valves, notoriously hard to find, this engine rebuild is gonna be anything but simple. NARRATOR With the rest of the car at a standstill, that just leaves the tatty seats to be worked on. Luckily, nothing can hold back our leather expert, John. Well, until now. TIM SHAW John boy! [LAUGHS]. Hey, oh, no, don't give me that look. You look stressed. What's the problem? Where are we? JOHN Before you start, over there, they're complete. TIM SHAW Wow, they look, those door cards look absolutely awesome. JOHN Front seats, stripped down, as you can see, they've gone through the first stage. TIM SHAW They look great, as well. JOHN Which highlights, that ain't finished, they've gotta go back in yet, which highlights any small areas that need correcting. TIM SHAW Right. I've noticed, you were giving them the side eye there. Is there something, do you pick up on some weird vibe from those seats? JOHN What, the ET seats? TIM SHAW What? They're known as the ET seats? JOHN Yeah, if you look at the headrest, it's a bit of a resemblance. TIM SHAW Phone home. TIM SHAW So ET was based on the SM seat? Busted, blown open, that's proof of the fact it's an alien vehicle. Does that make sense to you now? JOHN No, Tim. TIM SHAW Yes, John. JOHN Don't know what you're on about. TIM SHAW Something's, ah, yeah, that's what they all say. Anyway, listen, what are we doing with this? Some incident that's happened on this seat. JOHN So that's the problem, Tim, it was covered in filler, left so the leather would rot, so we're gonna replace it. TIM SHAW Right. JOHN Okay, seeing as you're here, you can give me a hand. TIM SHAW Yeah, sound, let's do it, yeah. TIM SHAW Right, John, so this is it. So what are we doing? Let's just get this straight, we've got old material here from the Citroen SM. JOHN Yes. TIM SHAW We've binned off this side and we've got a new piece, we're gonna join 'em together, with a stitch down the middle that you can't see, that's the join stitch, is it? RICK Correct. Now you have to make sure you follow that line. TIM SHAW That's right and if we did the needle too many times, where there are existing holes, it could just rip apart, couldn't it? JOHN Exactly. Off you go then, I need to get out. TIM SHAW No, but do you think I'm making a mistake? Is like a bit of a big risk job? JOHN Yeah, it is. If it's no good, Tim. TIM SHAW What's the collateral damage of me getting this wrong? JOHN The whole panel needs replacing. TIM SHAW The whole seat, the bolster, right down to the base. JOHN Yeah, the whole lot needs, and the whole one side will need replacing. TIM SHAW Well, I'm here, ready to do it, I wanna do it. NARRATOR Do you know? Sometimes it seems there's no end to Tim's hidden talent. But this isn't one of those times. TIM SHAW Oh, here we go, whoa, right. God, this is so hard. NARRATOR Perhaps it's better to just let the experts get on with it. And while John deals with all those unsightly rips and tears and patches up all the holes, back with the engine and Rick's now made an inventory of the hundreds of bits and pieces, worked out what's there and what's missing and cleaned it up. And is ready for the first crucial step of the rebuild, inserting new piston liners, using his own tried and tested method. RICK So what we'll do, we'll put these in the fridge, get 'em as cold as we can, which does work. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay. RICK And this as hot as we can, about 100 degrees [UNIT CONVERSION 212 degrees Fahrenheit]. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK And that gives us about a zero clearance. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right. RICK So it's expanded the block by two and a half thou, or two thou and the liner half a thou. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, so now, that to me sounds like this is time critical. RICK Absolutely. NARRATOR Yes, we're dealing with measurements less than a human hair. One mistake here could result in a cracked block and goodbye, engine. RICK Okay, let's get it out. It will have a wee everywhere. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. So. We're gonna draw 'em in sideways? RICK Yeah. The centre one in first. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, there's one. NARRATOR Well, that's one liner in, but with five more to go, maybe not celebrate too soon. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS]. RICK Wow. NARRATOR Back at the SOS workshop and with little else to do, the bodywork guys have decided to take a bit of a gamble. They're gonna go ahead and respray the car. Of course, if it turns out later that the brakes and the suspension all need removing, or the engine is an awkward refit, the bumps and scratches they're taking out now might be replaced later with bumps and scratches of their own making. So, while they're taking their chances indoors, Tim and Fuzz are hitting the open road, to find out what made the Citroen SM so futuristic. TIM SHAW Right, Fuzz, it's time to leave this planet in a Citroen SM. You're scared. FUZZ TOWNSHEND It's a very weird experience. TIM SHAW This car has so much technology on it, that we now accept as being commonplace, like it was one of the first, that when you're driving at speed, it stiffens up the steering wheel, so you can't accidentally knock it and go into a bush, or what have you. And then at low speeds, you can just rotate the steering wheel with a finger, I mean, it's so clever. FUZZ TOWNSHEND We're on quite a windy road, aren't we? TIM SHAW Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND And yet, when we're going into the corners, we're not sort of wallowing at all. TIM SHAW Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND We're just kind of staying level. TIM SHAW This is the vehicle that, if you have a problem, a puncture, you can pull over the side of the road, jack the car up, lift the one wheel off the ground that's got a flat and fix it there and then. I mean, this car is phenomenal, this was technology that even Rolls Royce couldn't create, the hydro-pneumatic suspension. They had to licence it from Citroen. FUZZ TOWNSHEND It's like the road is not like a road anymore, it's like turbulence. TIM SHAW Like an aircraft? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, and that's what it feels like, yeah. TIM SHAW Really? Or a ship. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. TIM SHAW Or a spaceship. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS] I see where you're going now. TIM SHAW No, I am going there, Fuzz, that's the thing, this is why I insisted that you drive this car. It irons the road out like nothing I've ever been in before. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, I reckon I could go over the rough ground. TIM SHAW Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Just over the fields, over the moorland and it wouldn't bat an eyelid. TIM SHAW There was one car that in 1971 just happened to win the Moroccan Rally. This thing got entered by Citroen. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. TIM SHAW Everyone was like, "What are you doing, entering that boat into this?" FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW It was a laughing stock. FUZZ TOWNSHEND It won. TIM SHAW It won. FUZZ TOWNSHEND [LAUGHS] Yes. TIM SHAW It won. I mean, how does that stuff happen? FUZZ TOWNSHEND I know. I know, it is incredible. TIM SHAW I mean, look at the dashboard, you've got such great visibility there of the clocks and a lot of that comes down to the fact your steering wheel is only attached in one place, the actual wheel itself. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So that's great visibility. But the clocks themselves are oval and they look like the type of clock that you might find on your granny's mantelpiece. TIM SHAW The only thing that lets this car down, frankly, and it's a harsh thing to say, is that engine under the bonnet there. FUZZ TOWNSHEND It's, yeah, it's a weak point. For a car of this size, it does feel a little bit underpowered. TIM SHAW Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND And I can understand why these engines give out. That engine is pulling along a lot of weight, really. As it is, everything else is brilliant. TIM SHAW And no other country on the planet, nobody other than the French would do this. So, I mean, this is like 70s chic, mixed in with technology that you've just no idea existed. If you had to choose a car that you'd imagine Elon Musk would drive in the 70s, what would it be? FUZZ TOWNSHEND It would be this. TIM SHAW It really would, wouldn't it? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, without a shadow of a doubt. TIM SHAW [LAUGHS]. NARRATOR Yes, it's back to the future, and the past all rolled into one. Although, the workshop, with an engine that's still a no show and little else to do apart from rub the paint down, this film is more of an edge of the seat production. NARRATOR Tim and Fuzz have taken on a Citroen SM, an epitome of weird and wonderful. TIM SHAW I mean, have you ever seen anything like it? This was from the early 1970s. NARRATOR The car belongs to building surveyor, Stuart, it was a 18 year long labour of love that ended in disaster, followed by ill-health problems, that robbed him of the energy and will to start over again. LEIGH He had to have major heart surgery. Like, I had to leave him at the front door of the hospital, it was awful. NARRATOR Since it arrived in the workshop, the SM has had all its dents and dinks flattened out, the oil pipes have been replaced and the seats re-trimmed. But the big story with this car's the engine. A full nut and bolt rebuild. But with so many irreplaceable parts missing, engine expert, Rick, is having to come up with some clever solutions, adapting valves from other engines. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So, Rick, where are we at now? So, obviously, we fitted the cylinder liners. Have you machined those out now? RICK Yeah, we've bored them, perfect size for the pistons. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK We've re-decked this block, prepped it, cleaned it, it's ready to build. FUZZ TOWNSHEND But these are our old valves and those were always the problem with these engines. RICK Absolutely, and that's what had caused this catastrophic damage within the engine. Because they're not very available, I ended up modifying a Rover V8 race valve for the inlet and a Ford Pinto exhaust valve. So we've just made it better. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, so the likelihood of the valve heads dropping off in future has been minimised. RICK Never gonna happen. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, so what about the pistons, those look like they've changed? RICK They have changed. We needed a certain compression height. We needed a certain bore. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK Nothing was available. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Again, yeah. RICK Again, so what we ended up doing is finding a Sierra Cosworth race piston. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK And using that. Yeah, and it's just a more modern piston, stronger piston, better material. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. RICK Thinner rings. You know, it's just what they would have done all those years ago, if they knew what we know now about pistons. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Come on then, let's get stuck in. RICK It's not the lightest thing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND No, I can believe it. FUZZ TOWNSHEND There we are. We are in. RICK You made that look very easy. NARRATOR Well, those make and do pistons might fit, but what will happen when the thing is fired up? And while Fuzz and Rick attempt to reassemble the rest of the engine, with their fingers crossed, back at the workshop and there's been a development. The car's gone into the booth for a liberal coat of gold paint. It's a good time, or maybe not, for Stuart's wife, Leigh, to pay a visit and witness what really is the big make or break moment. LEIGH Amazing. TIM SHAW You recognize that man, do you? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Hi, how are you doing? Yeah, good to see you again. LEIGH Hi, nice to see you. TIM SHAW Journey alright, all good? LEIGH Good, thank you, yes. TIM SHAW Stuart, any worries there? Has he been down? LEIGH No, he hasn't been. Luckily, it was so far away from our house that. FUZZ TOWNSHEND I mean, obviously, we know that the engine was the failure point and that's what stopped Stuart's project. LEIGH Yeah. FUZZ TOWNSHEND I think the best thing to do is show you how far we managed to get with it. LEIGH Okay. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Come on, come and have a look, come on. TIM SHAW Leigh, meet the legend that is Rick Wood. LEIGH Hello, Rick. RICK Nice to meet you, hi. TIM SHAW Right, so, that thing there, do you recognise it? RICK In one piece. LEIGH It looks amazing. RICK It's been a difficult birth, that's for sure. TIM SHAW Yes. I mean, talking about birth, though, we haven't run this engine up yet. So now. LEIGH Are we starting it up now? TIM SHAW Yeah. LEIGH Oh, my God. Can I just say, well done, no matter what happens? TIM SHAW Right, shall we do it? RICK Yeah, let's do it. TIM SHAW Come on. RICK This is it. TIM SHAW Go on, Rick. Best of luck. LEIGH Oh. TIM SHAW Go on, you tell him. You tell him. LEIGH Okay, Rick, go. [LAUGHS]. RICK Okay. LEIGH Oh, my God. TIM SHAW No, no, wait, wait. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Hold on, how's the oil pressure? RICK 9 bar [UNIT CONVERSION 130.5 pounds per square inch]. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, that's good. LEIGH Oh. TIM SHAW Come in here, mate, come in here. Come in here. What are you saying? LEIGH Oh, thank you. RICK It sounds lovely. LEIGH [LAUGHS] Yay! ALL [APPLAUSE]. TIM SHAW Thank God for that. Mate, you're a legend. RICK Thank you very much. LEIGH That's incredible, well done. TIM SHAW Let's knock it off. RICK It's not gonna blow up. LEIGH [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW You just never know. LEIGH Oh, my God, that's incredible. TIM SHAW That's great, isn't it? LEIGH Oh, my gosh. TIM SHAW Let's talk about giving the car back. LEIGH Oh. TIM SHAW So, what's he into and where can we make that happen? LEIGH He's massively into Formula 1, that's one of his huge loves. TIM SHAW Right, I tell you what, there is a Formula 1 Museum. LEIGH Right. TIM SHAW At Silverstone. LEIGH Okay. He's never been. TIM SHAW Has he not? LEIGH No. TIM SHAW So, if we have that combined with him there, combined with his car there, would that make for a great day? LEIGH Oh, my gosh, that sounds amazing. TIM SHAW Does it? LEIGH Yes. TIM SHAW Alright, shall we do that then? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, okay, sounds good. TIM SHAW Right, that's it, come on, let's go, let's go, let's go. Let's go, go, go. Right. NARRATOR Yes, thanks to Rick's genius, the Achilles' Heel of the car, the engine, is at last running sweetly. TIM SHAW It just needs mating up to the gearbox now and that is one new lump and one huge hurdle we've got over. NARRATOR And as we now have a date booked at the new Silverstone Museum, it's time for the rest of the work on the car to begin. And for that, we need all the stars to align, because until that Maserati block goes in and is plumbed up to the hydro-pneumatic system, we just don't know whether the brakes, steering and suspension are gonna work. And if you're a little woolly on the whole hydro-pneumatic thing, here's Tim to explain. TIM SHAW Here's a question. Can you guess what I'm bouncing up and down on? I'm actually bouncing up and down on air and that is exactly the same system that the Citroen SM uses. Now, in there, you can't see it, but there's a cylinder, there's a locked chamber of air, very similar to in this syringe. So, as you can see, it's open now, but if I block the end of it off, I'm allowing no escape of air, so that is now a sealed unit. But, look, if I go up and down, it'll actually compress but it's acting as a spring and that is the system the SM uses. Well, it's the starting point, because it does get a bit more complicated. Let me show you and it is nothing but genius. There's one wheel, there is the spring, in effect, of a regular car, that's the suspension. This is the suspension arm here and this bit represents the car. But on the end of a pipe, I have another syringe. Watch what happens when I push this down, compressing the air there, the air fills up in the other one and lifts the car up. And up it goes. So there's the suspension working. Now, if we keep this locked here, you can see the suspension working. Look, it's returning back to the height, exactly the same as the office chair. But, Citroen didn't wanna have four gigantic airbags in the four corners of the car and that is where they relied on another simple bit of key science. Now, inside this syringe is water. With air, you can compress it, but with water, if I put my finger over the end, its just like a brick. Now, let's fill each four corners with a fluid. Now, I'm using water, they actually used oil, 'cause they didn't want it to rust. So I'll pump it up. There we go, you can see the water going into it. Does the suspension work? Well, if I actually lock this air chamber with my hand, you can see that it's still returning to the right height, so the suspension is still working. But the genius of this is, that's the spring. It's, it can go anywhere. Let's say you put a ton of bricks in the back of your car on the left hand side, well, this car can go, hang on a minute, that's a whole lot more weight than any other of the three wheels, let's jack it up a bit. So it can actively compensate for the weight bearing down on the spring and it can continually adjust, basically, the rating of the spring. It's a genius system and that is how hydro-pneumatic suspension works. It's clever, isn't it? NARRATOR Well, that's how it works in theory, but does it work in practice? The engine might now be back in the engine bay, but the next big challenge is linking it all up, there's a myriad of electric cable, a plethora of interconnecting braided and unbraided hoses, all of which have to be pressure tested and bled. And with the reveal breathing down their necks, even Fuzz is wilting under the strain. FUZZ TOWNSHEND That looks like it should be long enough. TIM SHAW What makes this car so unique is the fact that the engine powers, not only the brakes, the suspension and the steering. So how do you get power from the engine into that end of things, which is actually here? Look, the pump, you can rotate it. Well, it comes through this thing here, which is a mini little prop shaft, like a propeller shaft underneath the car, and an unusual thing anyway to see on a car, because it's not often you take a feed off a camshaft to do something so important, like brakes, steering and suspension. Right, let me get this on here. Powers up all those crucial systems, so, once we've attached this up, this is gonna be one step closer to testing whether or not all that crucial stuff works. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So, we are just going through things at the moment and we know that the engine runs, because we've seen it on the dyno, so that's great. But this will check out that everything is connected as it should be within the car. JOHN That should just burst into life. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, let's give it a go. JAMIE Pull the lever. FUZZ TOWNSHEND There we go. JAMIE Oh, it's coming up at the back. JAMIE Oh, happy days. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Whey hey! That is it. We've been working towards this moment for such a long time and now, the car is alive. JAMIE There we go. FUZZ TOWNSHEND There we are. NARRATOR So, with both the engine and all the hydraulics fired up, we have a working car. But the race to get the SM back to its owner doesn't stop there. Next, the self-centring steering is checked out. And as soon as that's finished, it's onto the swivel headlights. Then, there's the interior to go back in. It really is a nonstop conveyor belt of hard graft. TIM SHAW Right, Fuzzbot. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. Oh, yeah, those are great. TIM SHAW That's where the problem was there and I did it, I fixed it with these own fair, I don't wanna show you my hands, but. FUZZ TOWNSHEND No, you didn't. TIM SHAW I did, I did. FUZZ TOWNSHEND No way. NARRATOR Exactly, no way. But once the seats are in, the car really is starting to look every bit the luxury grand tourer. Next up, the electrics are tried and tested,. All the exterior trim is slotted into place, as is a brand new exhaust. In fact, a restoration that was started 18 years ago looks like it's finally coming to an end. TIM SHAW Right, come on then. FUZZ TOWNSHEND What? What are you on about? TIM SHAW What? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, okay. You wanna see the party tricks? TIM SHAW Yeah, I need to see it go up and down. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, come on then, go and start it up, Rob. TIM SHAW Come on, Rob, stop messing around. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Okay, you ready? TIM SHAW No. Oh, whoa. It's doing it. Oh, my word, we have air. Look at that. Right, so on goes the full lock, the car self centres, by itself, that is amazing. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Brilliant. TIM SHAW That is awesome. FUZZ TOWNSHEND This is it, now, we're on the home straight. TIM SHAW But I did think we weren't gonna manage this one, 'cause it's so complicated. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yes, but we're not there yet, we've still got a few things to finish off. So, just hold your horses. NARRATOR If you are one of the millions of motor sport fans worldwide, then the Silverstone Museum is the place for you. The whole history of racing laid out before your very eyes. Including, today, for one day only, one exhibit that stands out above all the others. TIM SHAW Fuzzbot, the F1 Museum here in Silverstone, but the star attraction. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah, I know. I just need, just a brief minute to appreciate how beautiful it actually is. 'Cause we've been so close to it all the time and our heads buried in the problems underneath there. TIM SHAW It's lovely, isn't it? This is that moment where we can relax and go, it's happening today for Stuart. FUZZ TOWNSHEND So, come on, then, what's the plan? TIM SHAW Right. So he's coming down here, 'cause he's won himself a VIP tour with his mate. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Yeah. TIM SHAW Now, what happened in 1971 in Morocco? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Well, the Citroen SM actually won a rally. TIM SHAW Exactly. So this one, with the right decals all over it and a sign saying, this is the Morocco winning car might just pique his interest when he walks past it, pulls the cover back and, bang, guess whose car it is? FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, yeah, it's Stuart's. There is one slight small problem with that. TIM SHAW What's that, then? FUZZ TOWNSHEND We haven't got any decals on it. TIM SHAW No, we haven't yet, because we need Mr Decal to help out. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Right, okay, who's he? Me? TIM SHAW Crack on, son, get sticking. NARRATOR Yes, it's a simple sting that should catch out owner, Stuart, when he's least expecting it. And while Fuzz works out where he'd like to stick the decals, friends and family are here to help make the day. What do they think of Stuart's unfinished project? Now it's actually finished. LEIGH Oh, my gosh. TIM SHAW Here it is. LEIGH Wow. TIM SHAW Open the door, have a look in. It's absolutely perfect. LEIGH Oh, my, it looks stunning. It looks absolutely incredible. NARRATOR So, all good on the family front and time for Operation Rally SM to go into action. The car goes into disguise as a very authentic looking museum exhibit. Tim blends into the background as the obligatory living museum man in a helmet. And before you know it, an unsuspecting Stuart, who is here for a VIP day out with his mate, David, turns up in the foyer, where he's met by one of the guides, who, of course, is in on the scam. F1 MUSEUM GUIDE We've got loads of bits from F1 teams, like wheels and suspension and all of this interest in sustainability, I've done an interview piece just not so long ago. NARRATOR As a huge motor sport fan, Stuart's in his element, focused on the cars and not what's going on around him. The perfect time to unveil the museum's latest exhibit. TIM SHAW Hi, Stuart. STUART Hello. TIM SHAW How are you doing? Are you alright? STUART Fine. FUZZ TOWNSHEND Nice to meet you, I'm Tim. STUART Yes. TIM SHAW Do you recognize my face from anywhere? STUART I do recognise your face. TIM SHAW More importantly, do you recognise this? Come around here a little bit. Come round here a little bit. Not everything is quite as it may seem. STUART Right. TIM SHAW So, I have some news for you. STUART Yes. TIM SHAW This car here, which you're under the impression is the 1971 Morocco winner. STUART Yes. TIM SHAW This is your car. STUART My God [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW [LAUGHS] Don't run away, this is your car. STUART This is ridiculous. My God. TIM SHAW And if you don't believe me, there are a few people here that might convince you. Guys, come on out, come on out, come on. ALL [APPLAUSE]. STUART What a shock. What a shock. Hello. This is extraordinary. I'm completely shocked. TIM SHAW It's a runner, it works, it goes up and down and left and right. STUART Oh, my God. [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW Leigh, talk to your lovely husband. Talk to him about why you wrote to us. LEIGH You deserve this after a very tough few years. STUART Wow. I can't quite believe it [LAUGHS]. ALL [LAUGHS]. TIM SHAW Can we have a massive round of applause for Stuart and his SM car? ALL [APPLAUSE]. TIM SHAW It's your car. NARRATOR The last time Stuart saw his SM, it represented all the wrong things. A project he'd slaved over for 18 years, but that had ultimately failed, with ill-health robbing him of the energy he needed to start over again. Now, however, those dark days are over. His car's bodywork is as stunning as the day it left the factory, the paint and the trim, gleaming. The Maserati V6 engine has not just been rebuilt, but improved from top to bottom. The steering, the suspension and the brakes are all in good order. And the once cracked and torn leather interior looks absolutely fabulous. This is every bit the futuristic car that Stuart dreamt about for so long, ready for the next part of the journey. TIM SHAW How does it feel to be sitting in your car? STUART It's just so nice to be back in it after all this time. Can't wait to get it back on the road again and start to cruise down to southern France, something like that, you know, so nice to do another road trip, it would be fantastic, actually, with some friends. TIM SHAW Do you feel at home in this car? STUART Totally, yeah. TIM SHAW Were you aware of the amount of work that was gonna be required? STUART No. TIM SHAW [LAUGHS] Not at all? STUART Not at all, no. 'Cause I'm an eternal optimist, so therefore, everything's gonna be, it's always rosier in my world than maybe the reality. TIM SHAW Leigh contacted us, your wife contacted us and said, "Look, you know, I've watched my husband struggle with this car and I was there when it blew up." STUART I think she felt quite sorry for me, actually. She probably was, you know, probably feeling the pain I was feeling from that point of view. It was very upsetting to suddenly not be able to drive the car, after all that time. TIM SHAW Okay, so what happened, medically, what happened with you? You had some issues with your heart, didn't you? STUART Yes, I was born with a defective heart valve, which was only discovered a few years before that. TIM SHAW What was the problem with the heart? STUART It was just that the heart valve needed replacing. TIM SHAW So I'm right in thinking that the business suffered as well? STUART Yes, it did, actually, yeah. Bit of a stress situation. But I had to get back to work. TIM SHAW All these things coming at once. STUART Yeah. TIM SHAW The car, medical problems, COVID and the business struggling. STUART Sure. Yes. TIM SHAW It's a lot to cope with. STUART Yes, it is, yes. TIM SHAW And you didn't think you'd see yourself driving this car? STUART No. not really. Not when you think all the list of other things going on around you, you just think, well, actually, you know, this is a bit of a dream, really, seeing this. Well, it's a complete dream. TIM SHAW There is only thing left to do and that is to hand you these keys over and tell you, it's been a great honour to work on this almighty complex car. STUART Wow. TIM SHAW It really is a complex thing. There you go, you have been Car SOS'd, so. STUART Thanks ever so much. TIM SHAW Enjoy it. STUART To everyone. Amazing. Wow. That sounds amazing. TIM SHAW It's great, isn't it? STUART Doesn't it? TIM SHAW Well, there's only one thing left to do. And that is, get out on the open road. STUART Fantastic. LEIGH Wow. [LAUGHS]. STUART bloody hell. LEIGH It's so powerful. STUART It certainly didn't go like that before, did it? LEIGH No. [LAUGHS]. STUART [LAUGHS]. LEIGH I can't believe it's back on the road. STUART No. I optimistically thought, yes, I'll get it back on the road, but in reality, it'll be in the garage. FEMALE WITH LONG BLONDE HAIR IN BLUE JUMPER I think it went amazing. I think he absolutely loved it, like, this was his best day ever. STUART It's unbelievable to have this car back. LEIGH They've restored it beautifully, haven't they? STUART Yeah. LEIGH You must be so happy, Stuart. STUART It's incredible. LEIGH I think this will give him a huge boost, 'cause he's had a hard time, so, this will lift his spirits, a lot. MALE WITH WHITE BEARD With all the difficulties he's had in the last few years with his health and money worries, to actually see it like that is something very special. LEIGH All your Christmases come at once. STUART Yes, this is my only Christmas present. LEIGH [LAUGHS]. ### ### ###